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How did you last die
owned nerd Mr. V gets roasted
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this is a rube loaf
it is a gross item
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Cogwerks Wrote:this is a rube loaf
it is a gross item

I'm going to sue you for this workplace accident mad
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I threw a loaf of ludicrously dense prison loaf into a wall to test out its capabilities and it collapsed into a gravitational singularity AKA black hole.

Molecular gastronomy, never again.
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I also died in a horrible loafing accident
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Looks like you need to...

cool

Stop loafing around.


YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH
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Just another day as space janitor keeping the station clean with my trusty spray bottle.

Everyone wants to loaf me for some reason. I guess they like dirty floors.

Near QM, I run to what appears to be a miniputt in a new pod bay (I've been gone for 2 months)

I suddenly wonder why I can't steer. Turns out I boarded an escape pod.

Pod leaves the Z-level, explodes 3 times. Also, apparently my galoshes were a traitor objective that round so some guy killed himself at the end of his spree.
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I spawned as a spymaster and went straight to cargo to make loafs. I spent my ten crystals on microbombs since that's fun and I don't like the other items very much.

After some experimentation, I made a loaf that 1-hit kills people when throws. I went around braining people with this. Apparently there was a traitor scientist, because he loyalty implanted me.

I gave him the loaf and we made our way to the shuttle and waded into the crowd. Seeing a lot of people not in the scientist's personal mindslave entourage, I asked him to give me the loaf so I could kill them.

I had not properly explained the dangers of the loaf, so instead of dropping it, he threw it at me, whereby I was instantly killed, activating all 10 microbombs and killing everyone on the shuttle. The loaf laughed all the way to the Nanotransen docking facility.
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mucubed Wrote:I spawned as a spymaster and went straight to cargo to make loafs. I spent my ten crystals on microbombs since that's fun and I don't like the other items very much.

After some experimentation, I made a loaf that 1-hit kills people when throws. I went around braining people with this. Apparently there was a traitor scientist, because he loyalty implanted me.

I gave him the loaf and we made our way to the shuttle and waded into the crowd. Seeing a lot of people not in the scientist's personal mindslave entourage, I asked him to give me the loaf so I could kill them.

I had not properly explained the dangers of the loaf, so instead of dropping it, he threw it at me, whereby I was instantly killed, activating all 10 microbombs and killing everyone on the shuttle. The loaf laughed all the way to the Nanotransen docking facility.

That was an odd round, The scientist was on of the spys, and so was I. We had mindslaved each other at the same time. In the end all three of the living spys were done in by that loaf.
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The B-Baller's Game, staring Sir Mapleleaf, BALLER TRUE, and Mr. AI.

Code:
(I had set up a game of russian roulettein the boxing ring)

Sir Mapleleaf exclaims, "BALLER TRUE play a game of russian roulette with me!"
Luis Smith  [145.9] gasps, "I've been TROTTED ALL OVER by the HARLEM GLOBETROTTERS"
Roger Wilco  [145.9] says, "Sec is slammed to the ground"
Derrick Sholl  [145.9] says, "Mr.AI, please turn on the telescience equipment and receive twice please"
Sir Mapleleaf  [145.9] says, "The winner shall be thought of as the best B-Baller of all time"
Sir Mapleleaf says, "The winner shall be thought of as the best B-Baller of all time"
BACKBOARD takes a mighty leap towards the ceiling!
Sir Mapleleaf  [145.9] says, "I'm in the boxing ring"
Sir Mapleleaf says, "I'm in the boxing ring"
BALLER TRUE  [145.9] bellows, "I ACCEPT!!!"
BIG DRIBBLE does a quick spin, knocking you off guard!
Sir Mapleleaf  [145.9] says, "Come and play with me"
Sir Mapleleaf says, "Come and play with me"
Sir Mapleleaf says, "HEY"
System Confederation Update

Power Grid Warning

We have detected that the engine on board Drydock November has not yet been started. We strongly recommend setting up the engine, or else power failiures may occur stationwide.

(At this point BALLER TRUE enters the ring)

Sir Mapleleaf waves.
Sir Mapleleaf says, "Welcome"
Mr. AI  [145.9] states, "Scarlett Biery has signed up as Staff Assistant."
BALLER TRUE  [145.9] bellows, "YOU'RE GONNA GET JAMMED ON, SUCKA!!!"
Sir Mapleleaf asks, "Who goes first?"
Todd Rafter  [145.9] exclaims, "Help, I have been spat on !"
You look closely at BALLER TRUE.
*---------*
This is   BALLER TRUE!
BALLER TRUE is wearing a   purple Basketball jersey.
BALLER TRUE has a   Radio Headset by his mouth.
BALLER TRUE has a   basketball in his left hand.
BALLER TRUE has a   PDA-Dr. Singh on his belt.
BALLER TRUE is wearing   BALLER TRUE's ID (Captain).
BALLER TRUE looks slightly burned!
*---------*
Todd Rafter  [145.9] says, "By sebastian roberts"
Todd Rafter  [145.9] exclaims, "IT hurt like hell !"
Sir Mapleleaf says, "Me I guess"
The soda machine beeps, "Decirprevo. The sophisticate's bottled water."
You spin the cylinder.
Sebastian Roberts  [145.9] says, "i didnt do anything"
Todd Rafter  [145.9] says, "He's hiding in the mechanics workshop"
Sir Mapleleaf screams!
The soda machine beeps, "Drink Robust-Eez, the classic robustness tonic!"
Roger Wilco  [145.9] says, "HELP CHANGELING GAGE LAFORTUNE"
BOOM! Sir Mapleleaf's head explodes.
Sebastian Roberts  [145.9] says, "im stuck i nthere"
Sir Mapleleaf seizes up and falls limp, his eyes dead and lifeless...
Roger Wilco says, "CHANGELING"
Misto Maxo says, "i ate bad food"
Roger Wilco says, "CHANGELING"
Ms. Licorice asks, "changeling?"
BALLER TRUE  [145.9] bellows, "THATS RIGHT!!!"
BALLER TRUE bellows, "THATS RIGHT!!!"
DEAD: Sir Mapleleaf says, "welp"
Dr. Katznelson asks, "?"
Dr. Katznelson asks, "Where?"
Misto Maxo says, "and am being disabled by migraines"
Roger Wilco says, "GAGE"
Ms. Licorice says, "CHANGELING"
DEAD: Sir Mapleleaf says, "That didn't go so well"
DEAD: Ghost (Ric Flair) grumps, "WOOOO"
Roger Wilco says, "KILL IT"
Derrick Sholl  [145.9] asks, "AI?"
Derrick Sholl asks, "AI?"
BALLER TRUE  [145.9] bellows, "YOU GOT NO GAME!!!"
BALLER TRUE bellows, "YOU GOT NO GAME!!!"
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Almost blown up by a very competent changeling with [REDACTED] (apparently reagents in smoke can mix in the air?) which blew a hole in Chemistry where I was working. Blew my leg off but the Captain was kind enough to reattach it.

Borg came in, sealed the breach, I put internals on, all was fine and dandy. But then I was doing some recipes and for some idiotic, inexplicable reason put my oxygen tank in my backpack. (It was one of those big ones that you couldn't stick on your belt, and I was working with 3 beakers at the time) I also happened to be tabbed out and updating my recipe file, and when I came back I was in crit.

And then I died, but was subsequently revived and sent on my way, after which who I assume was the same changeling managed to completely blow up chemistry, nearly killing me again. Soon after the shuttle arrived, but that proved to be doom for us all.

Alas, but the shuttle doors were locked and the creature had a stun baton. We tried to enter through a window, but in vain. We were stunned and hastily thrown into space to perish by this alien monstrosity, who escaped alone.
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I activated my own pipebomb by accident.

Shortest traitor round ever.
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Doran Farrier says, "I TRAITOR OTO"
Doran Farrier is hit by the laser!
Doran Farrier is hit by the laser!
Doran Farrier is hit by the laser!
Doran Farrier gasps, "I TTRRIIIITTOOOORRR"
Doran Farrier is hit by the laser!
Doran Farrier is hit by the laser!
Xavier Bestmin says, "shit"
Doran Farrier emits a small clicking noise.
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Quote:You activate the pipe bomb! 5 seconds!
Snack Cakes says, "Rowr"
Friendly Stabb says, "Toasty"
Snack Cakes takes a huge leap!
Misto Maxo has added the fire extinguisher to the backpack!
Spigot The Bear waves.
Friendly Stabb points to the pipe bomb
the pipe bomb explodes!
You are struck by shrapnel!
Spigot The Bear screams!
Olly Oxenfree screams!
Tom Salzman screams!
Gordon Brackenly screams!
Rick Deckard screams!
Snack Cakes screams!
Misto Maxo screams!
Friendly Stabb screams!
Blood spurts out of your left leg stump!
Blood spurts out of your left arm stump!
Blood spurts out of your left leg stump!
You have given up life and succumbed to death.
Victoria Steele applies the healing patch to Friendly Stabb.
Spigot The Bear emits a small clicking noise.
Spigot The Bear emits a small clicking noise.
200 Credits catches on fire!
Spigot The Bear emits a small clicking noise.
Spigot The Bear emits a small clicking noise.
Spigot The Bear emits a small clicking noise.
Spigot The Bear emits a small clicking noise.
Spigot The Bear emits a small clicking noise.
Spigot The Bear seizes up and falls limp, his eyes dead and lifeless...
the chef's uniform catches on fire!
Humperdink McGee's left arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Olly Oxenfree's right arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Olly Oxenfree screams!
Mr. Melonbake's right leg flies off in a bloody arc!
Mr. Melonbake screams!
Olly Oxenfree's right leg flies off in a bloody arc!
Humperdink McGee's right leg flies off in a bloody arc!
Humperdink McGee screams!
Mr. Melonbake's right arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Redbeard Rum's left arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Redbeard Rum screams!
Mr. Melonbake's left arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Redbeard Rum's right arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Redbeard Rum's right leg flies off in a bloody arc!
Rick Deckard's right leg flies off in a bloody arc!
Tom Salzman's right arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Humperdink McGee's right arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Misto Maxo's left leg flies off in a bloody arc!
Tom Salzman's right leg flies off in a bloody arc!
DEAD: Ghost (Spigot The Bear) moans, "what a good microbombs"
Gratian Stafford's left arm flies off in a bloody arc!
Gratian Stafford screams!
DEAD: Ghost (Christopher Glass) laments, "Oh wow"
Rick Deckard's left leg flies off in a bloody arc!
Rick Deckard screams!
Victoria Steele's left arm flies off in a bloody arc!
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I died a true mad bomber.

My first act as RD was to make four tank transfer bombs with remote detonators, then secret them about the station with telescience and set them all off at once. Then while the station was in turmoil, I hid in maintenance to decide what gear I should spawn. The clear choice was three pipebombs and a microbomb implant for good measure.

I then proceeded to hide the pipebombs attached to mousetraps about the station to be stepped upon, blowing the poor sod who stepped on them into a pile of gore floating in the twisted wreckage of the once hallway. Through all of this, no one has any idea who did all this, or what's happening.

Deciding to step things up, I get the coordinates for the AI, and send him a fifth bomb, giving him only a moment to notice the bomb before it goes off, demolishing his upload. At this point, I play nice and call the shuttle for everyone, despite the captain uncovering my treachery through forensics.

After being arrested and dragged onto the shuttle, I brag about how easy it was to murder the AI, and how I was going to live through my misdeeds. The hardboiled detective decided to have none of that, and pumped my gut full of lead.

My implant proceeded to redirect that lead back into him, and the captain standing next to me. A fun round.
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