Overheard On The Station (And Elsewhere)

[Roomba]

I remain convinced that Dave is physically incapable of playing without shitting on everyone in the general vicinity.

[Erik]

I remain convinced that Dave is physically incapable of playing without shitting on everyone in the general vicinity.

Hello, please do not take my sarcasm serious.

[Naximous]

Join: Carbonhell-Franckf
<Carbonhell-Franckf> Heya
<HeadSurgeon> heya cogwerks
<Carbonhell-Franckf> wh--how the fuck
<Carbonhell-Franckf> *screams*
<Naximous> Secret identity!
<Carbonhell-Franckf> aaaaa

[parf]

The Emergency Shuttle has docked with the station! You have 3 minutes to board the Emergency Shuttle.
Strawberry says, "HAS ANYONE GOT ANY FRUIT"
Strawberry says, "OWN UP"
Strawberry says, "YOU CAN TELL STRAWBERRY IF YOU ARE SMUGLGING FRUIT"
Strawberry says, "NO FRUIT IS ALLOWED HERE"
Strawberry says, "DISCARD ALL THE FRUIT YOU HAVE"
Hadley Harrow buckles in!
Strawberry says, "IT IS ILLEGAL"

Strawberry (played by Gannets) was a traitor!
Objective #1: All fruit is banned. Remove all fruit. Success
Objective #2: Die a glorious death. Success

[parf]

DEAD: Jamar Rogers moans, "how come when i ate a butt i lost control of my body"

[Space_Cola]

KITT [145.9] states, "I have added Cryo Tube to the Crew Manifest as Captain."
Cesar Bombsky [145.9] says, "Set it to arrest"
KITT [145.9] states, "Status is now arrest."

[Camnui]

Chad Dickinson asks, "wht the hell happened?"

John Smith shudders.

Mr. Muggles rifles through Chad Dickinson's pockets!

Mr. Muggles faints.

John Smith goes pale for a second.

John Smith gasps.

John Smith gasps.

Cynthia Rose (as Eli Shick) says, "I asked for something boiling, he failed to deliver"

John Smith shivers.

Mr. Muggles shudders.

John Smith gasps.

Mr. Muggles shudders.

John Smith groans.

Chad Dickinson tries to remove something from John Smith!

Cynthia Rose (as Eli Shick) says, "So I boiled the bar"

[Roomba]

BEE [145.9] states, "fuck the syndie is eating a clown in ai"

[OMJ]

Okay...this wasn't me..

[Takov]

Some quotes from our favorite Markov chain bot.

[18:51] HeadSurgeon then again, im a genital pizza

[20:38] HeadSurgeon /kick thecheat vista user

<HeadSurgeon> be a terrible, terrible business men of war”

[15:41] HeadSurgeon president headsurgeon! god bless the central african republic

[08:35] HeadSurgeon ill waifu your head in the game

[20:20] HeadSurgeon has the mannerisms of someone else to say it again: thank fuck theres blood everywhere

[18:58] HeadSurgeon with that constable wendigo wanders up and puts dions in the shitter to decent person who didnt like his position is millitant sjws start shit

[12:05] HeadSurgeon your ban appeal from someone with extensive knowledge of the bad awful hellmans shit

<@HeadSurgeon> reminder that 2015 was not highly regarded

<HeadSurgeon> i saw an honest bee who shows interest in dongs, but more sad :c

[18:01] HeadSurgeon never forgive ea

[16:30] HeadSurgeon a high school romance novel jedi quest: the dangerous departments away from that point it directly relavent to my buddy ryan got so annoyed with recursive captaining

<HeadSurgeon> we assumed centcom might also be able to eat other people

[10:42] HeadSurgeon nothing official dwarf fortress challenge: comprehend weird fucking fanfiction

[14:53] HeadSurgeon will gain sentience

[00:36] HeadSurgeon a waifu ruin ur life

[14:00] HeadSurgeon agbagpipe bestmin

[SL the Pyro]

DEAD: Edward Smith moans, "Took someones blood and injected it cause they had a lot of drugs in their system"
DEAD: Edward Smith laments, "now I'm dead too"
DEAD: Edward Smith laments, "Worth"

[Roomba]

The space caique squawks, "CAN I GET THE ANIME NOW PLEASE?"
Dave [145.9] states, "Oh great, the birds are yelling about anime"

[CaptainBravo]

(7:22 PM) <BlackrayJack> Fucking bullshit
(7:22 PM) <EdVenture> blackrayjack put me in man. I'm ready
(7:23 PM) <efrem> what happened this time
(7:23 PM) * BlackrayJack ([email protected]) Quit (Quit: )
(7:23 PM) <efrem> LOL
(7:23 PM) <Bologna> oh no
(7:23 PM) <Bologna> he died for real
(7:23 PM) <Bologna> rip blackrayjack, forever
(7:23 PM) <NullAshton> karma is definitely real for motherfucker
(7:23 PM) <Bologna> he was a guy
(7:23 PM) * BlackrayJack ([email protected]) has joined #goonstation
(7:23 PM) <Bologna> who kept yelling at hea- oh hey he isn't actually dead for true forever
(7:23 PM) <Bologna> hello
(7:24 PM) <NullAshton> no that's a zombie
(7:24 PM) <NullAshton> kill it
(7:24 PM) <BlackrayJack> Whoops
(7:24 PM) <BlackrayJack> Accidental disconnect not ragequit
(7:24 PM) <BlackrayJack> Fucking bullshit happened
(7:24 PM) <@HeadSurgeon> you ragequit

[Totheark]

John Johnson [145.9] says, "I AM A DOCTOR"

John Johnson [145.9] says, "LET ME SAVE IHM"

You would DIE for some nicotine right now!

You feel slightly better, but for how long?

Cody Rose says, "Officer"

V.M. Straka nods.

Cody Rose says, "Right here"

Cody Rose points to Christopher Odd's ID Card (Captain).

You feel slightly better, but for how long?

You feel slightly better, but for how long?

John Johnson [145.9] says, "CLEAR BITCHES"

You feel slightly better, but for how long?

John Johnson [145.9] says, "We've lost him"

[Mageziya]

Sounds like A+ doctoring right there.