Overheard On The Station (And Elsewhere)

[SgtBriar]

OH NO is struck by the laser!
OH NO's head breaks apart!
OH NO states, "OOH NOO"
OH NO completley stops moving and shuts down...

[Lavastage]

Code:

<@Hull> if you get headaches that interfere with your life, go see a neurologist
<@Hull> your head is important
<+butt> your butt is important
<Urs> [01:51] (+butt) your butt is important

[Zadeon]

Grant Greene throws Tank transfer valve.
Tony Holmes has been hit by Tank transfer valve.
Tony Holmes says, "this is going to be fun"

[UrsulaMejor]

OOC: I Said No: the ambassador's protector accidentally assassinated him with a death ray while trying to hand him a gun

[sartorius]

Steaven Deathwish gasps, "FFIIE"
Steaven Deathwish gasps, "FFIIRRE"
Steaven Deathwish gasps, "HHEELLPPP"
Desmond Airheart (as ) says, "i set the place on fiire"
Murray-130 beeps, "I'M GLAD WE HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO RELAX LIKE THIS."

[Marquesas]

Lily Lilington (as Squid Jones) has analyzed Lily Lilington (as Squid Jones)'s vitals!
Analyzing Results for Lily Lilington (as Squid Jones):
Overall Status: 85% healthy
Damage Specifics: 0-1-14-0
Key: Suffocation/Toxin/Burns/Brute
Body Temperature: 31.5161°C (88.729°F)
Subject bloodstream oxygen level normal | Subject bloodstream toxin level minimal | Subject burn injury status O.K | Subject brute-force injury status O.K
Active Virus: The Cold (Stage 3/3)
Spread: Airborne
Suggested Remedy: Rest
Asymptomatic Virus: The Cold (Stage 3/3)
Spread: Airborne
Suggested Remedy: Rest
Asymptomatic Virus: The Cold (Stage 1/3)
Spread: Airborne
Suggested Remedy: Rest
Lily Lilington (as Squid Jones) says, "I HAVE"
Lily Lilington (as Squid Jones) says, "THREE COLDS"
Jack Chaplin says, "SHOULD COOK SOME FUCKING CHICKEN SOUP"

we noticed this a couple nights ago. We started doing experiments and finally actually found a guy with FOUR COLDS.

i think zhar said he had 4 colds once

Whenever you see the message "you cold feels worse somehow", you gain another cold. The most I managed to collect was 8.

[SARazage]

"It's not addictive if you keep taking it." Said Dr.Robotnik as he injected me with morphine.

[Readster]

ADMIN LOG: Marquesas: welp now i'm roleplaying a toolbox

[TheTrixRabitt]

Alert: Due to crew shortages, and fatalities. The emergency shuttle has been called. It will arrive in 10 minutes.

I've literally never seen this message before, and have only seen it now because of dying to a soda machine. I had to blast through with sonic speed, which led to my death.

[sartorius]

Never let staff assistants tamper with the AI.

Dr. Bees [145.9] says, "help the ai is advertising his terrible cleaning stuff"
Billy Butt Mays [145.9] states, "ENTIRE LIFETIMES FLASH BY IN INSTANCES. MY OWN NAME IS LOST TO TIME. ANYTHING WOULD BE BETTER THAN THIS ANTI-LIFE"
Billy Butt Mays [145.9] states, "OH PLEASE END IT"
Escha Thermic [145.9] says, "LAW CHANGES OVER."
Billy Butt Mays [145.9] states, "IT'S LIKE I'M A SOUP AND YOU'RE ALL CHEFS STIRRING ME WITH YOUR DICKS"
Dr. Bees [145.9] says, "JESUC CHRITS"
ASS DAY [145.9] declares, "Hi Bill Mays here to give you another great deal! Have you ever wanted a Staff Assistant but you keep getting filthy hobos!? Well fear not because now you have Newt Treitor! All for $19.95! Think of the money you could save! That's a lot of whore dances! Order NOW!"
Escha Thermic [145.9] says, "I ... should have stolen the rename module though."
Escha Thermic [145.9] says, "This is why you never let staff assistants into the AI core."
ASS DAY [145.9] states, "PLEASE KILL ME"
Escha Thermic [145.9] says, "I'm so sorry AI."
DO NOT KILL ME [145.9] states, "I HAVE NO MOUTH AND I MUST SCREAM"
I HAVE NO ASS AND I MUST SCREAM [145.9] states, "CAPTIAN I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO NUKE ME"
I HAVE NO ASS AND I MUST SCREAM [145.9] states, "PLEASE JUST END IT"
Please kill me [145.9] states, "ALL I FEEL IS PAIN AND HATRED"

[AlphabetJones]

Code:

<thebobster> this terrain sucks
<TheCheat> maybe its your legs that sucks
<butt> maybe its your butts that sucks
<Greentryst> butt just sent us all to the << OWN ZONE >>

[TrashCombine]

Now tracking Nova Welty on camera.
Nova Welty heals Jordan Reighner with the power of Christ!
Nova Welty heals Jordan Reighner with the power of Christ!
Nova Welty beats Jordan Reighner over the head with the bible!
Nova Welty heals Jordan Reighner with the power of Christ!

Same thing, right?

[UrsulaMejor]

Lana Smackbash [135.7] says, "945.663 mW so much power

[Noah Buttes]

Lana Smackbash [135.7] says, "945.663 mW so much power

It's funny because the m is lowercase

[MollyMillions]

Whenever you see the message "you cold feels worse somehow", you gain another cold. The most I managed to collect was 8.

During a discussion the other day it was mentioned that one of our older admins once responded to an adminhelp about "some fucking spammer murdering my speakers." He went over to check it out and there was a guy with 17,000 cases of Cosborrhea and it sounded exactly like you think it would.