Robustorama: a CYOA in spaaace

[phart]

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> Befriend owl by complimenting eyebrows

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In a snap and quite frankly really idiotic decision, you decide to try and break the wedgie-tough language barrier between YOUR TWO NON-PEOPLES throughout history! Unfortunately, your a goddamn donkeymulebrained jabroni who goes about complimenting the MOST UNDIGNIFIED PART OF AN OWL'S BODY, which is obviously and without a doubt the eyebrow you friggin' weirdo jeez!

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Good job dorko! The owl is crying like a pimply nerd rejected the day before prom! Also you've fallen over, truthfully being a robot programmed to only give a shit about humans you could care less about the owl and more about your poor design here!

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Way to face inner fears there, owl! Run off, why doncha? You have a SUPER-SERIOUS INVESTIGATION on your hands here anywhoo, sheeshaloni.

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Anybody there?
No?
Well okeydokery then.