Goonhub
09-18-2012, 07:53 PM
Big Boss is a bit of an oddball. After he was dumped in a random dumpster due to abortions being illegal, he was taken to a dump, and was lucky enough to be in the pile of trash that was being picked up for processing at a Dump shuttle. After somehow making it to the shuttle still alive, he was noticed by some of the workers, and became the crew's pet. For the first month he was simply called "That Baby" until the captain said one day that they treated "That stupid baby" like he was the "Big Boss" or somethin'.
This is the story of his childhood and how he got on Space Station 13
When Big Boss was brought into the medbay, the doctors were amazed he was still alive. The pressure on the mask was set minorly too low, which damaged parts of his brain, and he suffered a concussion from the explosion, which the doctors realised he came from when they found explosion residue all over the locker. They ended up forcing him to eat much Alkysine, which ended up reversing most of the damage, but he still isn't fully right in the head. He is normally the chaplain of the ship, although he has been known to dress up as "Shits n' Giggles the Clown" or "Postman Pat, the Religious Mailman". He is a good cook, and his signature dish is a roburger cake topped with suicider icing. He has been caught changing the AI's name to "Metal Gear", and has both been a diplomat for the Wizard Federation, while a Bible Wielding Anti-Mage. Either way, Big Boss is a nutcase, and should be treated with caution.
This is the story of his childhood and how he got on Space Station 13
Code:
He ended up finding a case of extremely outdated "DVDs" Containing episodes of "Metal Gear: The Animated Series", and was his main source of entertainment. He loved the fact that there was a guy named "Big Boss", so he started to attempt to make himself look like him. He found a old lab coat, a medical eyepatch, and a vice suit. It looked exactly how the man in the show looked like, but his hair was still not white, so he scavenged around for a bottle of bleach. After his attempt to bleach his hair white was known as futile, he ended up getting help from an ex-beauty salon worker who was their current intern for the captain.
Due to the intern caring for Big Boss, she started home schooling him, much to the captain's dismay. For the next 12 years she raised him as if she were his teacher, attempting to teach him right from wrong, while making sure he would not be an average idiot, and knew the wisdom of god. By the age of 20, Big Boss knew how to run most things on the shuttle, and was living a wonderful life, regarding the intern as his mother and angel. By now, anger had consumed the captain, and fate decided to send an angel of death his way. He was contacted by syndicate agents, and was told to destroy the ship to be rewarded extremely handsomely. In less than an hour, Big Boss's life became terror, welded into a locker by his intern to keep him safe, with a cheap shitty emergency space suit, a gas mask, a tank of oxygen, and his trusty "Big Boss" costume. He had to listen to the screams of his fellow crew who saved his life, and his teacher.
After a while, there was silence, and he wondered what was happening. Then, he heard a faint explosion, followed by a series of explosions! Before he knew it, the locker was forced into space by the explosions at a rapid speed, somehow managing to not become breached. Big Boss was rammed into the side of the locker, and knocked out. By the time Big Boss woke up, he knew that he was not moving, although there was still no gravity. He couldn't think straight, and kept sinking in and out of consciousness. He stayed in this situation for an unknown amount of time, and was woken up by the sound of his locker being rammed! He paniced, and started screaming. Quickly, the locker was broken open, and he was looking straight at a man with a pickaxe in his hand. The man was clearly shocked, and quickly shut the locker. He locked the locker closed, and started dragging the locker through space. Before Big Boss could attempt to react, he drifted out of consciousness.When Big Boss was brought into the medbay, the doctors were amazed he was still alive. The pressure on the mask was set minorly too low, which damaged parts of his brain, and he suffered a concussion from the explosion, which the doctors realised he came from when they found explosion residue all over the locker. They ended up forcing him to eat much Alkysine, which ended up reversing most of the damage, but he still isn't fully right in the head. He is normally the chaplain of the ship, although he has been known to dress up as "Shits n' Giggles the Clown" or "Postman Pat, the Religious Mailman". He is a good cook, and his signature dish is a roburger cake topped with suicider icing. He has been caught changing the AI's name to "Metal Gear", and has both been a diplomat for the Wizard Federation, while a Bible Wielding Anti-Mage. Either way, Big Boss is a nutcase, and should be treated with caution.