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GET DAT FUKKEN DISK
*scream

Well, I guess I'm armed and dangerous now. HA HAAAAaaaaaa
I suppose instead of declaring a state of anarchy, I'll found a state of anarmchy.

I go down to Medbay and ask them to replace my arm with whatever cool shit they've got.
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Welp. Being on fire is fun, but it's a bit more painful than I'd figured.

I scream!

Loudly.

Then I run to the pool and attempt a sick reverse triple-twisting triple back somersault dive, no splash.

While screaming, of course.

Loudly.
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Flipping through cameras is my favorite thing, I'm not stopping until I find something entertaining.
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I go find a way to make myself less on fire.
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";bluh dumb merchants. AI call the shuttle please, i wish to send a package to centcom"
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HONK HONK HONK HOOOOOONK
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I ready my weapon and head towards the location of the nuke
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Hrmph.

Superlagg says, "may that be a lesson to you, groundskeeper."

Despite being completely engulfed in flames and Discount Dan's aerosolized slime, I feel a chill. Damn. Don't need a reagent scanner to know that I'm a quart low on drugs.

I shrug and wander off to grab some lunch. Which is to say a shitload of coffee, chocolate, cigarettes, and Donk-Po--

Dang it. There are two boxes of Donks on the station. One's locked away in the kitchen, the other in a mashed pile in Crew Quarters. That's probably why today's sucked so hard.

Whatever. I go to whichever vending machines are between the nuke and New525 and get my horrible, horrible lunch.
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I walk in and attempt to get everyone on board plan nuclear skateboard with the most convincing argument I can make: waving a jetpack with wheels stuck on it in their faces while screaming incoherently.
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I'll wait patiently for the roboticists to finish making me robot limbs.
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What? Can this be true? Capitalism, Dead? OH HOLY LENIN I DID IT, I FINALLY FUCKING DID IT, WOO! I attempt to convince all of my supporters to join me and declare independence from nanotransen and form SSS13, Socialist Space Station 13! WOO!
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I begin the first round of Discount Dan's weaponizing research and see what a beakerful of whatever's in the tub does to a monkey (surely, you should be able to scoop a beakerful from a bathtub in-game). I note over the radio that if we sent news that to Centcom that Research got one of the Syndicate's nukes, Science would get tons of funding and promotions, and personally note to myself that I find something in the DD research, I could get an even better promotion, maybe even replace that stupid RD we have currently.
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(08-27-2017, 01:54 PM)Roomba Wrote: I walk in and attempt to get everyone on board plan nuclear skateboard with the most convincing argument I can make: waving a jetpack with wheels stuck on it in their faces while screaming incoherently.

HA
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Winklabom (1?): That went over so well, you think you've got another one.  You make a joke involving a capitalist banker and a bank robber.
It's dead silent.
HeadOfSecurity: My father was a banker that was shot last week, you inconsiderate ass.
Wait was there a meeting on that?
Man, awkwaaaaaard.

Flourish (n/a): You *scream*.
You feel significantly better due to medical attention.

NesMettaur (4): You head down to medbay to get your arm replaced.
One of the robotics officers quickly staples a robo arm to your missing limb.
Apparently, they're all amazed at how clean the arm came off, along with the fact that you're not bleeding.

Vitatroll (3): Man, being on fire sure sucks.
You decide to put out the fire the easiest way you know how.
You scream your way to the station pool and proceed to do a sick flip into it.
You smack your head on the side of the pool.
Things feel a little too painful to focus on swimming properly.

Lord Birb (6): There's a lot of things going on, but you just happen to notice...
Your next action assumes you successfully saw an event of your choice.

Hydrofloric (4): You continue to extinguish the fire.
You no longer feel like you're on the sun.

NateTheSquid (n/a): As captain, you have final authority to a shuttle call.  (Security Level Check.)  Things seem out of hand enough to the point that a shuttle may be necessary.  (Nuke Status check.)  Scans indicate the shuttle is not in immediate danger of destruction.
The shuttle has been called.

Noah Buttes (2): You're not sure when or how it happened exactly, but you think you've caught ablaze.
Truely the life of the clown.

New525 (3): The nukes been compromised.  It needs to be found as quickly as possible before anything else.
All you know is that the nuke was taken away from it's last location.  You don't know where to go from there.

Superlagg (6): You've had a pretty shitty day today.  You still haven't had your god damn breakfast, for crying out loud.
You feel like calling it quits and just ordering some shit from a vending machine...
Wait, what's that?
Is that?
You heard it was a myth, but...is it truely real?
A Donk Pocket Vendor?
HOLY SHIT!
YOU ORDER THAT SHIT NOW!

Roomba (3): You wave your skateboard in front of your face, screaming incoherently.
Nobody knows what to make of this.

Berrik (n/a): Your limbs have been replaced by robotic limbs.
Security will have a harder time arresting you for any reason (Second failure/enemy success role necessary).  Your punches and kicks pack a little extra oomph.

fosstar (6): You rally everyone and convince most of the staff that you should all make your own space station.  And it'll have blackjack.  And hookers.  It'll be the best damn station there is.
It looks like it may have to wait though, apparently an escape shuttle is on its way.

Studenterhue (3): You take a bit of the...whatever...and dump a bit of it on the monkey.
It appears to be burning its skin.
The monkey gets irritated and attacks you, spilling some of the chemical on you.
It appears to be burning your skin.

Everyone:ALERT!  THE EMERGENCY SHUTTLE HAS BEEN CALLED!  ALL CREW AND PERSONNEL ARE TO STOP WHAT THEY ARE DOING AND PREPARE TO LEAVE THE STATION!  FAILURE TO REACH THE ESCAPE SHUTTLE IN TIME WILL RESULT IN BEING LEFT BEHIND AND PRESUMED DEAD!  THE SHUTTLE WILL BE HERE WITHIN FIVE MINUTES because I really don't feel like putting down a time limit that takes an entire god damn week!  UPON ARRIVAL, YOU WILL HAVE TWO MINUTES TO BOARD THE SHUTTLE!

Syndicates:Update.  Activate the Nuclear Bomb before the Escape Shuttle arrives to send it back.  Inability to do so will result in mission failure.

Current situations:
Security Level:NUCLEAR! (Only personnel actively harming the crew or aiding the syndicates are to be dealt with)
Disk Location: NesMettaur
Nuke Location: Science
Time til Nuke Explodes: N/A
Fluke Ops Incoming: Not only is Awfulworldkid really bad at this, he was purposefully given terrible plans too.
Competent Medical Staff: Medical actions + for the station.
Rally of war: The captain has aroused the crew into action. + vs. Syndicates.
1 star Wanted:Noah Buttes
3 star Wanted:Superlagg
Station Damage:Armory
Depressurized:Podbay
Engineering, Mechanics, the Bar, the Kitchen, and medbay are open to anyone!
The Janitor's closet is open to anyone except scientists, Chef's, and Bartenders!
The Captain's Quarters is open to All heads of staff!
Hydroponics has been bolted down.
The Ore processing room is bolted open!
Communism (85%) vs. (15%) Anarchy
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I approach the captain, and suggest that we sell the nuke to one of my "special contacts" for something "very important". If he allows it, I'd like to use it as one last bargaining chip with Vurdalak for my frickin' soul.
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