Best moments ever thread 2.0

[Swedish Horror]

Antonio Dennis [145.9] says, "NO JANITOR THATS NOT A REGULAR CART"
Antonio Dennis says, "NO JANITOR THATS NOT A REGULAR CART"
York Justice: thanks
OH JESUS CHRIST
the meat cube shudders worryingly!
Suds Sadsack says, "Oh shit"

[Dachshundofdoom]

Antonio Dennis [145.9] says, "NO JANITOR THATS NOT A REGULAR CART"
Antonio Dennis says, "NO JANITOR THATS NOT A REGULAR CART"
York Justice: thanks
OH JESUS CHRIST
the meat cube shudders worryingly!
Suds Sadsack says, "Oh shit"

The greatest accidental murder I ever indirectly caused.

[Tteckk]

War... War never changes..

It stared half way through a round, everything was normal, till 4 captains joined the station. I, myself joined their ranks from a lowly position as assistant. The ID just fell out of Streloks pocket.
Soon after a meeting was held to count authentication disks, The joys soon turned sour as a horde of zombie flesh burst through the entrance. Blood was spilled, we fought for our lives well but soon became overpowered. With our deaths, Centcom sent Clowns to dispose of the mess, Plan A during such an outbreak. All they did was tumble to the ground and turned themselves. Plan B was fierce, a force that would never stumble, nor die. Or so we thought.. The first encounter left us departed with more then half of our army, the second we held firm.



Then it started..
The Bridge doors were ripped open to find at least Twenty of those things reaching for our flesh.
After a tough fight the horde died off, few were left and soon all that remained was blood and Rolling pins.
The tears of victory were sweet.



I dont know what happened after I called the shuttle, I lost connection and had re download the files.
Because BYOND.

[Conor12]

I am a mute, twitching, half-blind, deaf, chavish, swedish Goku-Elvis with Cloak of Darkness and heat resistance. I stand out slightly.



And the round before: I was a swedish, chavish smiling man. Chef Buttes mindslaved me and told me to promote his bowling antics.

Conor McNice [145.9] says, "p r oo b oo v l ee n g "

No-one knows what the fuck I'm saying and Chef Buttes murders them while they sit there trying to translate what I say.

[Klayboxx]

I am a mute, twitching, half-blind, deaf, chavish, swedish Goku-Elvis with Cloak of Darkness and heat resistance. I stand out slightly.



And the round before: I was a swedish, chavish smiling man. Chef Buttes mindslaved me and told me to promote his bowling antics.

Conor McNice [145.9] says, "p r oo b oo v l ee n g "

No-one knows what the fuck I'm saying and Chef Buttes murders them while they sit there trying to translate what I say.

Buahahaha that was hilarious. One guy actually said "WAIT, WHAT IS CONOR SAYING!" as I threw a bowling ball at his face.

[Swedish Horror]

OOC: Swedish Horror: swedish goku cluwne
OOC: GorillaMyDreams: DID SOMEBODY SAY SWEDISH
You feel Swedish... somehow.


then the entire crew got turned into gibbering swedes thrashing violently around and the only non-swede was swedish man jenkins.

[Conor12]

Fucking with genetics right now is hilarious.

I was a morbidly obese swedish clown and I hilariously got stuck in the disposal pipes. A sad fat clown.

I was released by an anonymous admin and dumped on the Escape shuttle. A Shambling Abomination failed to move my fat ass before eating me.

I am a large meal.

IRC:

<Conor12> MENTORHELP: Conor12: I am a morbidly obese swedish clown and I have gotten stuck in the disposal pipes, what do I do?
<nana> mentorhelp isnt for IRL issues

[Klayboxx]

I ordered a surplus crate. I opened it, got a mindslave implant, an advanced energy gun, a mustache grenade, and a floor closet. I thought "oh neat!" and opened the floor closet. Inside the floor closet was another surplus crate with a floor closet inside.

[Admiral jimbob]

Got to the end of a deep-cover traitor round disguised as the HoP, but it was really late and I have to be up early. So it's early end-of-round rampage time!

Spigot The Bear fires Spacker-12 at Devon Vectif!
Devon Vectif is hit by the A-12 Buckshot!
Andy Prevatt says, "HOLY SHIT"
Chance Russell punches Spigot The Bear!
You have been protected from a hit to the chest.
Spigot The Bear fires Spacker-12 at the floor!
Rocco Burnswichy throws the flashbang.
Spigot The Bear says, "I HAVE TO GO TO BED"
Andy Prevatt says, "SPIGOT"
BANG
Spigot The Bear says, "TRAITOR ROUND OVER"
Spigot The Bear tries to fire Spacker-12 at Rocco Burnswichy pointblank, but it was empty!
You have added Spacker-12 to the backpack.
you set the output to laser.
Irvine Simmons [145.9] says, "Good news station, mining is full of blood."
Chance Russell has been shot pointblank with the energy gun by Spigot The Bear!
Chance Russell is hit by the laser!
Rocco Burnswichy has been shot pointblank with the energy gun by Spigot The Bear!
Rocco Burnswichy is hit by the laser!
Chance Russell has been shot pointblank with the energy gun by Spigot The Bear!
Chance Russell is hit by the laser!
Rocco Burnswichy has been shot pointblank with the energy gun by Spigot The Bear!
Rocco Burnswichy is hit by the laser!

At this point, HoS Dick Justice entered the scene and witnessed my deeds. I didn't mind too much, but I figured we could be civil about it all. And so we were! After a fashion.

Spigot The Bear says, "yo Dick"
Dick Justice exclaims, "oh man!!"
Rocco Burnswichy has been shot pointblank with the energy gun by Spigot The Bear!
Rocco Burnswichy is hit by the laser!
Chance Russell has been shot pointblank with the energy gun by Spigot The Bear!
Chance Russell is hit by the laser!
Rocco Burnswichy seizes up and falls limp, his eyes dead and lifeless...
Chance Russell seizes up and falls limp, his eyes dead and lifeless...
Spigot The Bear says, "I have to go to bed."
Dick Justice says, "thats fucked up"
You have added the energy gun to the backpack.
Misto Maxo [145.9] says, "buy things from him"
Spigot The Bear says, "I know, I was so undercover"
Dick Justice says, "you shot the clown whyd you do that"
Spigot The Bear says, "but it's three o' clock"
Spigot The Bear says, "you know how it is"
Andy Prevatt moans.
Dick Justice says, "you shot the clown"
You have added Shotgun Box to the backpack.
Dick Justice says, "youre going down buddy"
Andy Prevatt has scanned the recharger!
You reload Spacker-12 with ammo from A-12 Shotgun Shells. A-12 Shotgun Shells has 0 rounds left.
Spigot The Bear reloads Spacker-12.
Dick Justice says, "im going to fuck you up"
Spigot The Bear fires Spacker-12 at the floor!
Andy Prevatt asks, "can I scan an energy gun please?"
Spigot The Bear fires Spacker-12 at the floor!
Andy Prevatt says, "uhh"
Spigot The Bear fires Spacker-12 at the floor!
John Johnson [145.9] says, "ai"
Andy Prevatt gags and retches!
Andy Prevatt says, "I don't want none of this Spigot"
Cheezeburger [145.9] states, "yes"
Dick Justice punches Spigot The Bear!
Dick Justice stuns Spigot The Bear!
You begin to recover.
Andy Prevatt groans.
Spigot The Bear says, "aww rude"
Spigot The Bear has been shot pointblank with Spacker-12 by Dick Justice!
Dick Justice fires Spacker-12 at Spigot The Bear!
You are hit by the A-12 Buckshot!
You start bleeding!
... You can almost hear someone talking ...

He's so gentlemanly.

[Captain_Bravo]

God, there's something magical about a man who tells you that he is going to fuck you up, then proceeds to fuck you up.

[Buzzbomb]

Round 1: Traitor!

5 or so minutes in I am expertly chainsawed to death by Spetznaz Spiff.

I am sad.

Round 2: Not Traitor!

Spetznaz Spiff is captain and Vox goes off saying "A BAD CAPTAIN! FART ON THE CAPTAIN!" repeatedly.

I proceed to chase, harass, RCD block and eventually fart on said captain over a few departments and Z-levels (a fun chase).

Suddenly I get a sydicate uplink and am free to cause some chaos!

Without hesitation I summon up a spacker and blow Spetz's head off.

After promptly being executed by the crew one of my fellow Captain hunters asks in deadchat "What the hell did you do that for Sam?"

"I was a traitor suddenly!" says I.

"That wasn't our objective Sam!"

Objective 1: Hang out with the Captain for a good time.




... ... :downs: ...




Admin PM from InfiniteMonkeys: You have got to be the worst wingman ever.

[Xanatov Valerius]

This speaks for itself.

Xanatov Valerius [145.9] asks, "AI, do you know how to work the solars?"
Xanatov Valerius asks, "AI, do you know how to work the solars?"
Metalhead [145.9] states, "no, first time in AI seat"
You have added Camera monitor to the backpack.
You look closely at Chan Ling.
*---------*
This is Chan Ling!
Chan Ling is wearing a Mechanic's Jumpsuit.
Chan Ling has a Engineer Headset by his mouth.
Chan Ling has a utility belt on his belt.
Chan Ling has insulated gloves on his hands.
Chan Ling has a backpack on his back.
Chan Ling is wearing Chan Ling's ID Card (Mechanic).
*---------*
Chan Ling asks, "can I scan them before you take them?"
Xanatov Valerius says, "Scan."
Optical Thermal Scanner has been hit by Chan Ling with the device analyzer
Chan Ling has scanned Optical Thermal Scanner!
You have added Optical Thermal Scanner to Box.
Xanatov Valerius [145.9] says, "Alrighty then. Let's cover a few things."
Xanatov Valerius says, "Alrighty then. Let's cover a few things."
Xanatov Valerius [145.9] says, "If there are any antagonists aiming to kill me out there please wait until I finish teaching the AI a few rudimentaries."
Xanatov Valerius says, "If there are any antagonists aiming to kill me out there please wait until I finish teaching the AI a few rudimentaries."
Metalhead [145.9] states, "hahaha"
Xanatov Valerius [145.9] says, "Click on my name, AI, and you'll see where I'm standing."
Xanatov Valerius says, "Click on my name, AI, and you'll see where I'm standing."
Xanatov Valerius [145.9] says, "There's a computer to my left, and a white structure to my right."
Xanatov Valerius says, "There's a computer to my left, and a white structure to my right."
Chan Ling [145.9] says, "this would be a good time for an antag to get him"
Metalhead [145.9] queries, "mhmm?"
Xanatov Valerius [145.9] says, "The computer displays power information when you click it."
Xanatov Valerius says, "The computer displays power information when you click it."
Wizzy Pants says, "ICEE BEEYEM"
The magic missile SLAMS into you!
Xanatov Valerius is struck by a magic missile!
You begin to recover.
You are hit by the laser!
You are hit by the laser!
You are hit by the laser!
DEAD: Ghost (Xanatov Valerius) says, "welp"

[Xanatov Valerius]

My apologies if there is a no-double posting rule.

However.

Late night round. Not much going on. Blob shows up right on the edge of a traitor picking up the artistic toolbox I locked up from another traitor earlier.

I decide that the best solution is to fight the blob with a plasma fire.



This was a terrible decision. I died for unrelated reasons to do with a special toolbox. Apologies to the one guy who exited the shuttle and was immediately confronted by a fireblob.

[Hard Boiled]

I am also sorry for unlocking the miners hacked thingy and the toolbox. Also, Old Scruffy came on later and he escaped it. Oh, and the one who got the toolbox got eaten by it. Anyway, sorry nonetheless. But man, that was a nice fire/blob mixture. If I'm not mistaken, we also had some kudzu near the end.

[Xanatov Valerius]

I am also sorry for unlocking the miners hacked thingy and the toolbox. Also, Old Scruffy came on later and he escaped it. Oh, and the one who got the toolbox got eaten by it. Anyway, sorry nonetheless. But man, that was a nice fire/blob mixture. If I'm not mistaken, we also had some kudzu near the end.

*Shrug*

I've played antagonist against you before, and you've treated me pretty well, so I can't blame you for doing the same on behalf of other antagonists. Nothing was really going on in the round and there were only a few people on anyway.

Also, it was funny to watch him try to track you down and just run right on past. So, all-in-all, no worries!