Ye Olde Regular Tabletop Discussione

[babayetu83]

hello, i've made this thread in order to bait in other tabletop afficionados such as myself and others to discuss good builds, stories, and etecetera

today in a session i played, i was an unchained rogue. 1000X better than the normal version. so anyway, my party was assailing a castle. full of goblins, gnolls, and flynns which are bigger, badder gnolls. i managed to befriend some of them after the fighter got pushed down into a puddle of water and took his lunch money. anyway. so i'm probing for some alternate entrance points while the mage, fighter, cleric, and gunslinger basically go out and murder all of the goblins, except for one or two. the one, who was currently in the kitchen, and one hiding behind a doorway. i was in that kitchen. sneaking in through an airduct, where i finally found my way into the kitchen. deftly, i hopped out, and tumbled to the floor without managing to alert the goblin to my presence. i saw that he was cooking something for the dragon in the castle. so i decided to relieve him of his duties. forever. i tiptoed up to him, and got a whooping 16 dmg stealth attack, killing him. but before that, i whispered into his ear faintly: "rats off to ya. as if it were some kind of apology for wholesale slaughtering the entire goblin fortress, as well as him. now i had a really snazzy chef's hat to go ontop of my turban. as combat raged on outside of the kitchen, i followed the recipe he had on his body, butchered the poor thing for its meat. can't have no stew for a dragon without no meat. as combat finally ended, i was still cooking a stew. i also managed to convince my partymembers to contribute for a slight variation of fox mutton stew, which turned out to be rat poison, a fortune cookie, caltrops, 15 doses of shiver, and a spent bullet after the gunslinger tried and failed to shoot me for calling her fat. it was complete. if we managed to feed him the horrible concoction, we'd have a highly strung out dragon on our hands, for the killing.

should i even bother posting the rest

[Stryxic]

So, for our Star Wars Saga campaign, we're a group of pretty much epic level characters. This is the story of how everyone died. In our party, we had a level 9 Solider/Bounty Hunter Gand being played by me, a level 10 Human Jedi who started his own rebel alliance, and was rapidly getting dark, A level 9 independent droid who was completely mental (to the point where he was asked to do a cavity search with hands the size of.. Well, a large droid's), a level 9 Twi'lek Noble with Jedi Training who started a paramilitary organisation, and Nate. A Janitor/hacker/disgraced Alderaan noble.

Recently we had all left our station in the hopes of finding Obi Wan Kenobi, after our Jedi had ripped the information unwillingly out of Bail Organa. When we came back, most of our party had their memories of Kenobi wiped by him, and our station was hella damaged. We had been attacked by a load of Mandalorian Super Commandos, who had stolen our Jedi's children. At this point our organisation was decent size, we had stolen 2 star destroyers, had a load of cruisers and smaller ships. We weren't massive but we could get things done. Our Jedi was leading us to Mandalore to fight back to get our children, and we dropped out of Hyperspace early. Surrounded by I think 5 star destroyers, and two Interdictors. We were in a Lambda shuttle. We pretty much had to dock, otherwise we'd get blown out of the sky. So we dock, our Jedi walks out, and who is there? Darth Vader. See, we'd kind of been on the Empire's shitlist for a while what with assassinating a Moff, stealing a ship by running through it naked, forcing an ISB colonel to need a colostomy bag, freeing a load of Jedi, general piracy, and things like that.

Turns out, our Jedi had sold us out in order to a) become Vader's apprentice, and b) get his children back. This led to various things including Vader breaking our noble's jaw for talking too much, our noble injecting the Jedi with an ungodly amount of Morphine, a sniper crit missing me and hitting Vader in the back, our droid self destructing with the last words of 'The eyes will always be watching you', and the Janitor running back into the shuttle to have a drink. Rather than fight Vader 1 on 1, which would have probably ended badly, I tried to negotiate with him about trading the information of his two living children's location in return for the rest of our party surviving. We get taken to a small room, our Noble is given medical treatment, and I tell Vader what he needs to know. Then the Noble attempts to throw a window at Vader, at which point he's impaled by several inquisitors. Oh dear.

At the end of everything, our Jedi became full dark side, my Gand helped Vader find people in order to be able to return home, our Janitor was installed as the new ruling house of Alderaan, our Droid was dead, and our Noble was just... Sort of alive, but everyone thought him dead.

As a result we had to all roll up new characters, except for the Janitor, and our Mechanic who wasn't available for that session.

[BruiseCruise]

DMed a zombie survival campaign using some lousy RPG ruleset I found in a boardgame. We only ran one session, but it was pretty eventful. My old roommate brought half a liquor store's-worth of booze, too, so that really helped with the IMAGINATION.

The Characters:
Ivan and Uncle Boris: Two Russian immigrants running a bakery. Wielding their trusty rolling pins, the two looted a sports outlet for comfortable tracksuits (only available in pink) and all of the energy drinks they could find. Ivan ended up being the second most robust character by clubbing four bandits and several zombies to death. Both spoke in heavy accents; Boris being nigh incomprehensible.

Dawn: Archetypal teenage barista who spent most fights and encounters sighing and being catty to everyone else. Managed to jimmy a safe open, though, so there's that. Frequently rejected advances from Todd and Marvin.

'The Todd': Jock with every point dumped into strength and charisma, the team's muscle. When he wasn't one-shotting zombies with his baseball bat, he was giving Marvin wet-willies and hitting on Dawn. Would also give Marvin Indian Burns if he used words that were three syllables or more.

Marvin: The exact opposite of Todd, a neckbeard who tossed his points into brains and skills, but not much else. His weapon of choice was his replica katana and, when the situation called for it, his PS2. Initiated a huge inter-party brawl when Todd broke his copy of Final Fantasy 8.

Rickety Kip: Vietnam-scarred homeless man and the team's wildcard. To make things interesting I would have Kip's player roll to avoid flashbacks in stressful situations, but it was usually more beneficial for him to go into commando mode. Saved Marvin, Dawn, and Todd on separate occasions after he mistook them for his squad members back in Khe Sanh and managed to hold the highest killcount in the team, zombie and human. Also made a ghillie suit out of a camping tent which was surprisingly effective.

Nothing really got done in the session apart from shenanigans. I made it a point to roll every time the team made too much noise to see if any zombies would be alerted to their position and due to Kip's frequent flashbacks, group friction and the players' rising drunkness, this proved to be a rather nasty mechanic. Highlights include the team setting off a parking lot full of car alarms, Kip alerting a horde during a particularly nasty flashback, the team looting a sports outlet and getting fucked up on energy drinks and vitamin supplements, and the session culminated in a huge shootout with a group of bandits that was almost avoided until they noticed Kip trying to flank them in tent camo. The RPG system was garbage, but I wish I could have finished that campaign.

[bubs]

[Admiral jimbob]

I run Paranoia campaigns and use VOX as the voice of Friend Computer

[FloozyBarge]

Two notable things in the Story of Ladd Erman, Human Sorcerer. (I carried around a small ladder with a permanent shrink spell on it because his backstory involved living in a canyon with no horizontal space.)

First notable thing, our Warforged fighter killing the BBEG with my ladder since he had improvised weapon.

Second thing, that same Warforged Fighter rolling a 20 to intimidate the sun to immediately set so we could attack a Goblin camp in the darkness.

[Weavel]

I once ran a 4E adventure in a universe I'd created, and wanted to tease the party with a bit of legend. I had them make perception checks to notice the distant silhouette of a dragon in the clouds over a small forest

which they promptly started riding towards

at level 1

in session 1

I gave them a load of scary backstory to ward them off this decision, telling them of the horrors of the Red Dragon of Mt. WhateverIcalledit, how his father massacred the entire ancient civilisation and went to an eternal sleep, how hotblooded the son was etc. etc. it just riled them up more UGH

I didn't want to outright massacre them, so I gave them a skill challenge instead
which they fucking passed on their final step with a crit on a religion check

fuck players sometimes

[Sex_Robot]

I once ran a 4E adventure in a universe I'd created, and wanted to tease the party with a bit of legend. I had them make perception checks to notice the distant silhouette of a dragon in the clouds over a small forest

which they promptly started riding towards

at level 1

in session 1

I gave them a load of scary backstory to ward them off this decision, telling them of the horrors of the Red Dragon of Mt. WhateverIcalledit, how his father massacred the entire ancient civilisation and went to an eternal sleep, how hotblooded the son was etc. etc. it just riled them up more UGH

I didn't want to outright massacre them, so I gave them a skill challenge instead
which they fucking passed on their final step with a crit on a religion check

fuck players sometimes

I've had that situation. They did get fucking massacred and called me a bad DM and we never player again.

Fuck players.

[Zadeon]

I had a round of Brikwars (a complete rule system for a warhammer like table top battle but with Legos) with two other friends awhile ago. It was very fun. Two friends versus me, where they controlled an army of sober (and angry) Russians who wanted to attack a king in order to steal his vodka. One friend had two guys critfail one after the other and kill themselves after slipping on piss trying to kill another dude. They also managed to summon a god-like space miner to come and throw a truck onto two of my guys, killing them. There was an explosive kebab kart as well (which they failed twice trying to set it off). In the end they pushed through my forces and the king tried to escape in his death-sports car, had it blown up along with the Russian Leader: Kommander Kommissar. The king and Kommissar are flung across the man, then they try beating each other up but fail. So after failing a diplomatic feat my king gets his legs shot off and tells where all the vodka is.

Here's an image of the resulting carnage:

[Infinite Monkeys]

Someone DM a game on roll20 for SS13 people, TIA

[Conor12]

I once ran a 4E adventure in a universe I'd created, and wanted to tease the party with a bit of legend. I had them make perception checks to notice the distant silhouette of a dragon in the clouds over a small forest

which they promptly started riding towards

at level 1

in session 1

I gave them a load of scary backstory to ward them off this decision, telling them of the horrors of the Red Dragon of Mt. WhateverIcalledit, how his father massacred the entire ancient civilisation and went to an eternal sleep, how hotblooded the son was etc. etc. it just riled them up more UGH

I didn't want to outright massacre them, so I gave them a skill challenge instead
which they fucking passed on their final step with a crit on a religion check

fuck players sometimes

Too dumb to live.

[UrsulaMejor]

in a campaign I've been running, the party is waging a sort of Dragon Highlander war where they represent a bronze Dragon God that wants the party to kill and absorb the power of all the other Dragon Gods so he can resurrect Bahamut.

before that, though, the party was escorting Price Mel'vin to his treasury, finding it guarded by a dangerous Giant Enemy Crab. They gave the sorcerer prince a scroll of fireball to attempt an opening volley, but he rolled a critical failure on his use magic device. upon rolling d100 to see how bad the mishap was, he rolled a 1. Prince Mel'vin and the crab were utterly erased from existence, and the party promptly developed amnesia regarding them. finding themselves at the treasury and holding the family key, but unable to remember why they were there, they decided they must have been there to loot it and enter

[FishDance]

Someone DM a game on roll20 for SS13 people, TIA

But Monkeys, we've been doing that for about a year now! There's even a thread about it, you goof!

[mozi]

Someone DM a game on roll20 for SS13 people, TIA

what sort of game are you looking for?

[mozi]

Ars Magica, set in the 22nd century and everyone is members of the space wizard federation