Toxic/Abusive/Flippant Behavior - Efrem/CaptainBravo - 10MAY2021

[Mrfishstick]

Just to be clear since a lot of folks seem very intent on sharing your opinions or judgements. These posts are not helpful or constructive.

Please only reply to this thread if you were an active participant in the events directly related to this complaint or have had some similar actions with the admin in question which would add prior context.

We are not looking for community judgements on complaints. These complaints exist to flag an admin or group of admins behavior to bring to the attention of the rest of the server staff.

[AWarriorBunny]

Someone posted just such a complaint and was edited for being part of the peanut gallery, I'm getting mixed messages here.

[Vorlice]

It actually was peanut'd for a valid reason. On looking back I realize emotions got the better of me, I apologize. I shall cease posting.

[Flourish]

Efrem wanted you to acknowledge that sometimes you don't need to be the hero, and that you can let things play out. The issue isn't the actions you took that round, but rather your refusal to admit that there were alternatives, and to say "okay I get that". Can you really not imagine a dayban being justified, at all? I'm not saying you can't criticize how he talked to you, but I really can't buy that there was no justification at all and that you were totally right and he was totally wrong.

And when I say exhausting, I mean uniquely exhausting. Efrem took the time to try and explain things to you ingame. Then he tried to explain things to you over Discord. Then he tried to explain things to you on your ban appeal. Then you made this complaint thread. Over a day ban, you expect him to spend at least four or five hours of his twenty four hours catering to you. That's a lot of time, energy, and effort.

Again, yeah, some of Efrem's responses were rude. "Efrem was rude to me and I wish he would've been nicer" would make sense as an admin complaint. But what you're doing right now isn't that. You're doing a lot more and accusing him of a lot more. Portraying yourself as "respectful" and using nice words doesn't make you or your behavior nice or any more respectful. 

(For instance, it doesn't really make sense thank me for my response if you're going to disregard it a sentence later, and call it silly.)

Or take this -

We pride ourselves in being one of the nicest, most accepting and well-behaved SS13 communities. It's unfortunate to see the stance you're attempting to portray, Flourish.

You're basically saying that I'm in opposition to "being one of the nicest, most accepting and well-behaved SS13 communities" by calling you out on accusing Efrem of being "toxic" and "abusive". Do you think that makes sense?

My takeaway for you - coating everything you say in a veneer of politeness while directly accusing someone of being "toxic", "abusive", and "bullying", and while private messaging many different members of the community specifically to garner sympathy and support for this event (why? so that they'll post on your thread?), is pretty dang manipulative, and you should stop.

[Slazenger]

I think it's a shame that being frank and candid regarding the situation results in it apparently turning from a thread regarding the admins conduct into one ostensibly about mine. And I think I have reason to be upset that the rules were flagrantly tossed aside and a ban was issued for zero reason whatsoever and got to listen to someone's disrespectful attitude from the second it was brought up.

The fact that an admin, who should be held to higher standards than the playerbase by all accounts, is allowed to conduct themselves in this way is an unfortunate example of how we are outwardly intolerant of people who treat others poorly but won't address it when it needs to be.

Your mischaracterization in the closing of your last post is also noted.

Could the thread please be closed to prevent any further unwanted posting from uninvolved parties? The matter can be considered closed but unresolved. We're all spending time discussing admin conduct that never should have happened and never should have been remotely tolerated.

[Mrfishstick]

Locked per Slazzy's request.

[Flourish]

We've discussed this complaint internally as a team, and also privately with Slazenger. The team considers this to be resolved.