Best moments ever thread 2.0

[Bandit]

I recently had an assassination target that was in the same department as my buddies who were giving me chems for my Buff-R-Matic. I didn't wanna just outright kill him, so when Beepsky came around I saw an opportunity. I said something like, "if you continually fart, Beepsky sometimes goes away. it's really weird but it actually works" and he proceeded to fart. Being a chaplain, I promptly threw my bible under him and he gibbed instantly. I also had a farting contest with the HoS and did the same thing.

[Sundance]

Being a chaplain, I promptly threw my bible under him and he gibbed instantly. I also had a farting contest with the HoS and did the same thing.

I literally applauded in real life when this happened. I remember saying beforehand something along the lines "There's probably some bad reason for this" yet went ahead and did it anyway in the name of fun.

[Readster]

After a changeling round in which I became a paranoid scientist yelling at people to stay away from me, GorrilaMyDreams announced in the pre-game ooc for everybody to follow me around (without doing any actual harm, just shoving me about).
Hoping for antagonist so I could kill anyone who tried to follow me, I started the round. Regrettably I wasn't one, and cursed loudly in the radio that I wasn't, alerting everyone that I couldn't do shit to them.

Just then, I suddenly become a vampire (special thanks for that). Now the fun begins. I walk into dark secluded areas and my fans follow, only to be eaten. At one point I unfortunately got the chaplain as my fan, but being resourceful I led him into the crematorium and cremated him, problem solved.
I even changed the AI's laws to make it my biggest fan, it's other laws being meaningless if they don't allow it to help me, and renaming it likewise.

A fun round indeed. Thank you for that.

[Shoddy]

becoming badmin for a round.

[popecrunch]

i made a banana gun. it was a .357 revolver reskinned to look like a banana

the abnabner salad fires the banana at the floor!

the abnabner salad reloads the banana.

i can't stop giggling send he;lp

edit to add: this should be a clown traitor item

[Sord213]

edit to add: this should be a clown traitor item

Assistant traitor item*
Imagine hearing over the radio that some assistant just murdered someone with a banana

[Klayboxx]

i made a banana gun. it was a .357 revolver reskinned to look like a banana

the abnabner salad fires the banana at the floor!

the abnabner salad reloads the banana.

i can't stop giggling send he;lp

edit to add: this should be a clown traitor item

HELP POPECRUNCHS BLOOD ALCOHOL LEVEL IS WELL ABOVE THE LEGAL LIMIT!

[popecrunch]

actually i'm completely sober, this idea came to me when i was having a pretend gunfight with my wife last night using bananas

don't judge me, when you're together for uhhhhhh 11? years now you have to get creative to keep things fresh

[Klayboxx]

I'll never eat a banana again.

[Readster]

I made 16650 credits selling meth.
20% of the station budget spent on meth.
I love meth.

[Dauntasa]

I made 16650 credits selling meth.
20% of the station budget spent on meth.
I love meth.

I went around selling Health Tonics, all of which were at least 50% meth, 20% crank.

[Weavel]

i slapped someone in the face with the entirety of act 1 of Hamlet

[Readster]

After the craptin busted my meth shop and tried to brig me, I was rescued by the miner Kitty Litter and escaped to mining. There I opened my new meth lab, with kitty as my on station trader. They gathered me chems and brought them to mining where I mixed the drugs and gave them to be passed out around the station.
At one point I lost an arm to a PDA bomb and became the one armed meth cook who works in a dark room on mining.
We made 3950 credits.

[BlackPhoenix]

I was chilling out in the lowest room of the Escape Arm, just kind of semi-afk waiting to leave the station for the round. I'm tabbed out, and hear the telltale sound of a fire extinguisher hitting my head. I tab back in, and the HoP has welded me in and hit me three times in the head with said extinguisher. Within 10 seconds I had him pushed down, stunned, choked, and spaced. It was a good day.

[Weavel]

Isaac Kirkhope [145.9] exclaims, "Selling an exceptionally explosive primate in the market. He'll blow us all to bits at the tiniest flame! 1000 credits, or best offer!"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "want a bomb munky"
Cy Finlay asks, "Now, just how explosive is this primate?"
Cy Finlay asks, "What sort of yield are we looking at here?"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "the jazz lounge was used to test them"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "it's gone now"
Cy Finlay says, "Oh jesus"
Cy Finlay asks, "and you just set it on fire?"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "I am also explosive"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "yes just set it on fire"
Cy Finlay says, "Oh my"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "or I could light a cigarette"
Cy Finlay asks, "Could you make ME explosive?"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "I could, but not now."

Cy Finlay says, "How much for the primbomb"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "1000 creds."
Cy Finlay says, "Oof"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "Or best offer/reasoning."
Isaac Kirkhope drops the Cigarette. Guess they've had enough for the day.
Cy Finlay asks, "How about a wicked chainsaw?"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "Hm?"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "What sort of chainsaw."
Cy Finlay says, "The green sort"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "Ehhh"

You show off your card: Isaac Kirkhope's ID Card (Research Director): assignment: Research Director

Isaac Kirkhope says, "How would you use this monkey."
Cy Finlay asks, "Got a light?"
Isaac Kirkhope throws the igniter.
Cy Finlay fumbles around with the the igniter; a small flame erupts from the Cigarette.
Cy Finlay says, "I mean"
Cy Finlay asks, "What else do you do with a monkey bomb?"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "Well, the obvious."
Isaac Kirkhope asks, "What would you blow up?"
Cy Finlay drops the Cigarette. Guess they've had enough for the day.
Cy Finlay throws Cigarette.
Isaac Kirkhope says, "oh"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "oh god"
Cy Finlay says, "COME ON MONKEY"
Cy Finlay says, "COME ON"
This is a Cigarette. It is a tiny item.
Isaac Kirkhope says, "dude"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "I"
Cy Finlay says, "See. I knew this would happen"

Cheveyo detonates in a huge blast!
Cy Finlay seizes up and falls limp, his eyes dead and lifeless...

DEAD: Ghost (Isaac Kirkhope) wails, "I told you it was an explosive monkey"