Brain Jar for Postmortem Trials

[LovelyMimic]

Repairbot V.6.1 (Cyborg) [145.9] states, "i was going to suggest we borg the wiz and give him a trial"

S.L.O.T.H. (AI)  [145.9] states, "honestly we need the ability to just put dead people's brains into shitty jars with microphones on them so we can try them for crimes"

Totus Ubertas (Scientist)  [145.9] says, "Oh my god yes"

Elastical Gomez (Captain)  [145.9] says, "i approve of this idea"

Grubbyhands McGee (No ID)  [145.9] says, "post that in suggestions forum"

Grubbyhands McGee (No ID)  [145.9] says, "good idea"

Totus Ubertas (Scientist)  [145.9] says, "Just have a bit of furniture in the court room, slap it with a brain, it locks them into the brain to answer questions"

[kyle2143]

Sorry, you're just one step short of a great idea. HEADS IN JARS!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SxWd4Rf4H6k

[Superlagg]

Butts in jars. Hold trial with a butt who farts a testimony. Bring a stenchnographer.

[Technature]

Only if the only thing they can translate is their imagination.

"It says it was tired of being placed on the heads of staff assistants. It wants to be on the head of someone higher."
"Captain, if you could?"
"No."

[Sov]

So in the code there's something similar to this, but its unused

Basically a brain wired to a toolbox. Those I think can speak, or even be wired up to a bomb so that they can detonate it at will

[The Grim Sleeper]

So in the code there's something similar to this, but its unused

Basically a brain wired to a toolbox. Those I think can speak, or even be wired up to a bomb so that they can detonate it at will

I've seen this too, but was under the impression that the code was turned off, because being a living brain-in-a-jar meant you couldn't ghost, and considering the amount of pussyfooting about being imprisoned for more then 5 minutes, it was considered a 'worse fate then death'.

[Frank_Stein]

Could probably just allow suicide as a brain jar. Just have it explode the brain into gibs

[Technature]

Just have it explode the brain into gibs

[LovelyMimic]

Just have it explode the brain into gibs

Now see that's ideal, because when the brain of the accused is being cross-examined by the HoS or a prosecuting attorney or whoever, they can opt to either play along, or announce "I'll see you all in hell!" and just explode, splattering everyone nearby with braingibs.

[Frank_Stein]

Just have it explode the brain into gibs

Now see that's ideal, because when the brain of the accused is being cross-examined by the HoS or a prosecuting attorney or whoever, they can opt to either play along, or announce "I'll see you all in hell!" and just explode, splattering everyone nearby with braingibs.

Not to mention, they have the chance of being proper borged or body swap cloned if they win their trail, but if they say fuck it and explode, that's it for them

[Vitatroll]

How about some practical tests? Next time a jerk dies, borg em' without limbs and have them stand trial. If need be some leeway could be given to laws for testing purposes.

I mean it sounds like a neat idea, but trials tend to be horrible. They always drag on longer than intended and are usually instigated by one person trying to alleviate their own boredom. Honestly for entertainment's sake a trial should only be held if the crime was interesting.

A epic 30-minute back and forth between the entire station and a clown traitor hopping between his clowncar and spacelube-mobile sounds like an amazing trial subject.

30 minutes of silent murder by Lazy McCloak'nPen is not.

Oh, actually on topic - heads in jars is always a good idea. You were dead anyways so DNR and suicide are always an option. I just have a thing with trials.

[Frank_Stein]

How about some practical tests? Next time a jerk dies, borg em' without limbs and have them stand trial. If need be some leeway could be given to laws for testing purposes.

I mean it sounds like a neat idea, but trials tend to be horrible. They always drag on longer than intended and are usually instigated by one person trying to alleviate their own boredom. Honestly for entertainment's sake a trial should only be held if the crime was interesting.

A epic 30-minute back and forth between the entire station and a clown traitor hopping between his clowncar and spacelube-mobile sounds like an amazing trial subject.

30 minutes of silent murder by Lazy McCloak'nPen is not.

Oh, actually on topic - heads in jars is always a good idea. You were dead anyways so DNR and suicide are always an option. I just have a thing with trials.

 
Yeah I'm more for the "simple" Borg style that heads in jars offer. 

Personally, I think you should be able to attach brain jars to all sorts of stuff to allow them control over it. Like bots built for cleaning, or repairing breechs. Like Drones, but with more agency and personality. And by personality I mean instead of being cute and non-offensive, they're acrid assholes

[Kovirii]

sprite me a river brain jar

for the full effect consider adding wires, bubbles, maybe a version with legs

[Sov]

sprite me a river brain jar

for the full effect consider adding wires, bubbles, maybe a version with legs

Give it those terribly wonderful ai chicken legs

[LovelyMimic]

I acknowledge the arguments made by those wary of a courtroom-specific brain jar and will take a stab st spriting a more general-purpose brain case later when I'm fully awake