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GET DAT FUKKEN DISK
guess no extravagant suicide today. I run on down to escape. If I see and recognize new then I'll unload on him, if not I'll just ignore the burning man, it's probably his fault he's on fire anyway
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Ah, well. Dead Man's Chest isn't even a historical shanty. Still great fun though. Since singing isn't going over so well, I'll fix that by

SINGING SOME MORE! Waheeey.

This time something more in line with the station's demographic: [insert anime opener that's 300% anime]!!

((Welp. Time to search for anime openers. I can't really run jokes like this if all my shit is 15 years old.))
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There's another answer to this, I reckon. I ask the nuke what cool powers being a nuke gives it, so that together we can devise a plan to pull a fast one on Vurdalak and jack his ship and the soul. This is the only true escape from this mad crew.
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With my shell destroyed, I return to my previous strategy of trying to bolt him down, while also informing security of his location.
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I do what every good clown does when presented with an escape shuttle.

I place banana peels in front of its doors.
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I flail all of my appendages around attempting to smack whatever hit me.
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I take a bottle of preferred booze from the singing anime man and smash it over the head of whoever currently has the flamethrower.
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Well, bummer, guess it all spilled out when the crazy crazy guy fell in.

But you know what goes great with bathtubs? Meth! I haven't made a tubful of meth in a long time (as in never). I bet the whole shuttle will love me if made a meth tub, and who knows, maybe I'll get a promotion ( or at least the privilege of keeping my jobk if I bribe those CentComm goons with more meth than they've ever seen before.
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I start punchin'.
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I look for a fire extinguisher. If I find one, I try to find the dancing burning man in order to put the fire out.

If I don't, I shout some more over the radio about the man whom shot the cyborg dead and give away his location so that any other cyborg may finish him off.
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What a fuck-up. But oh well. It's time to pick myself up and go. I dejectedly get back on my skateboard and ride to escape.

-Shake it off
-Get back on the skateboard
-Ride to escape in a depressed manner
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New525 (Crit check 6, +1 minute) (4): You remove your metal suit, removing the biggest reason for the constant burning pain.  In your struggling, you pull out a syndipocket and eat it.
You're quickly recovering.
You're no longer in critical condition.

NesMettaur (6): You create a large amount of slot machine, drink machine, snack machine crates, and a single Zoldorf crate.
You make your way to escape.

HotCoffeeMug (2)+ Superlagg(4) + Roomba(5) vs. Berrik(6): Hot, Super, and Roomba all attempt to beat Berrik into submission.  Before they can do anything else, he opens fire with his flamethrower.
HotCoffeeMug is now on fire.
Superlagg is now on fire.
Roomba just BARELY manages to avoid being on fire.
The bush is now on fire.
Security is moving to contain the situation.
Berrik is wanted by security for endangering the crew significantly more than the syndicates have today.

NateTheSquid (6): You grab some weaponry and make your way to escape as quickly as possible.

Vitatroll: Nobody seems to be okay with your current singing, so you decide to change genres and focus on anime(4).  The theme you pick is somewhat generic, but passable.

Bologna Prime (n/a): You ask the nuke what it is capable of doing.
Apparently, it can explode into a big ball of death and fire, but it requires a Nuclear Authentication disk in order to do so.
It can also take surprisingly large amounts of punishment from gun fire and explosions, but can't handle blunt objects nearly as well.
Logic dictates this should be impossible.

Lord Birb (2): You immediately try to get to the location of your ex-cyborg to bolt down the syndicate.........
Wait, where the hell was it?
Shit, you're not 100% sure where that cyborg actually was.

Noah Buttes (5): You use the nearby chaos to your advantage and place a banana peel at each of the doors for the shuttle.
Anyone NOT SPECIFICALLY WALKING IN may trip.

Hydrofloric (5): Some shit is going down nearby...
HOLY SHIT IS THAT FIRE!?!
You immediately roll out of the way.


Studenterhue (5): Work today hasn't made much progress.
Let's just make a tub full of meth and call it a day.
Okay?  Okay.

Winklabom (5):Wait, was that man on fire just...dancing?
Does he have no idea the situation?
You grab a nearby fire extinguisher and spray the man down...
...oh...it was the clown...
That explains a lot.

a pleasant hug (5): Not a lot of people can say they built two skate parks in a day.  Though to be fair, not a lot can say they destroyed them on that same day either.
You sadly, yet efficiently, make your way to escape on a skateboard.

Attention crew!: The escape shuttle has boarded the station and is awaiting passengers.  You have two minutes to board the shuttle!  Failure to board the shuttle will result in you being considered dead and being left behind!

Attention Syndicates!: The time to activate the nuclear bomb has run out.  The syndicate does not tolerate failure.  Your self-destruct implants have been activated.  You have two minutes left to live.  This time can be extended, but only if you somehow manage to board the shuttle.  
Viva la Syndicate!

Current situations:
Security Level:NUCLEAR! (Only personnel actively harming the crew or aiding the syndicates are to be dealt with)
Disk Location: NesMettaur
Nuke Location: QM Office
Time til Nuke Explodes: N/A
Time until the shuttle leaves:2 minutes.
Fluke Ops Incoming: Not only is Awfulworldkid really bad at this, he was purposefully given terrible plans too.
Competent Medical Staff: Medical actions + for the station.
Rally of war: The captain has aroused the crew into action. + vs. Syndicates.
1 star Wanted:Noah Buttes
3 star Wanted:Superlagg
Station Damage:Armory
Depressurized:Podbay
Engineering, Mechanics, the Bar, the Kitchen, and medbay are open to anyone!
The Janitor's closet is open to anyone except scientists, Chef's, and Bartenders!
The Captain's Quarters is open to All heads of staff!
Hydroponics has been bolted down.
The Ore processing room is bolted open!
Communism (80%) vs. (20%) Anarchy
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I'm gonna run onto the shuttle (hopefully managing to leap over the bananna peel) and continue laying about me with the flamethrower whenever anyone gets near me. Burn!

Also I'm going to scream something about the solarium over the radio.
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i'll jump in the command segment of the shuttle and tell the ai or a borg to bolt it shut once the other heads are on board
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I continues to roll away and attempt to harness my rolling power to remotely power the station... or just keep rolling till there is no fire left.
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