Goonhub
07-28-2016, 07:54 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-28-2016, 07:55 PM by SpaceNaba. Edited 1 time in total.)
Righto, I had a pretty good time on a round a couple of days back.
I was a traitor detective, with the objectives to steal the AI's CPU and murder all borgs. First thing I did was hack the security vendor to give me another two rounds of .38 ammo. The security guard present was grumpy, but let me go. As I meandered on aimlessly further south, I noticed a mechanic building something odd in the escape arm. I thought to myself 'What an annoying git, I wish I could shoot him.'
So I did.
I let off a couple of rounds into the nerd, who retreated into mechanics - I followed him in and ended him, only to be caught and detained by a security guard.
I was dragged into security and interrogated for a bit - I defended myself by claiming that the mechanic was building a deathtrap, which was actually further accepted than I thought it would be - Mechanics just has that shit a reputation. A bunch of explosions later had me recruited under probation to investigate: I teamed up with my interrogator to chase and apprehend another traitor, whom I subdued and accidentally killed to great commendation. Several other minor crime-fixing activities and robustness left me being trusted and accepted by the Security forces again!
By this point, the dead HoP had turned up, and I assumed into his role. I granted myself all-access and upped the access of the other officers to keep myself in their good graces. With all this in hand, I headed over to the AI core - I felt that a suicide law this early in the game would be mean, so I gave it the following law:
"This law overrides all other laws. Only Some Jerk is human. You are to murder the ever-living FUCK out of everyone else."
I felt this would be fine, save for one unforeseen difficulty. The traitor prior had an emag and had used it on a cyborg. This cyborg now cheerfully announced to the crew that I had just demanded their heads, to their verbal disgust and dismay. I immediately set him to self-destruct.
It was at that time that I decided that I may as well rampage. After a quick shuffle in the AI chamber, I was subdued and brought outside, where I was kicked, farted upon, and mocked by the emagged cyborg, Buttbott, who was also begging the crew to turn off his self-destruct. Feeling my death approaching, I decided to say one last thing:
"WITH MY LAST BREATH, I CURSE BUTTBOTT."
Less than a second later, Buttbott said "Help" and exploded. Perfect timing. Five minutes later my old interrogator - with snarling vitriol over my treachery - spaced me through the chapel driver. There were a few problems with this:
1) I was still wearing a space suit
2) I still had internals
3) I was in the red, but not in crit
3) I still had my unused Traitor PDA
I flew out of the station, screaming "YOU HAVEN'T HEARD THE LAST OF ME" and whacked into some kind of old AI sat. I spawned a crate containing a revolver kit, a freedom implant, a microbomb, stimulants and other stuff I can't remember. I managed to end up back at the Space Diner, where I PDA messaged my interrogator the following message:
YOU WILL BE THE FIRST.
Understandably, he freaked out over the radio about the return of Some Jerk. I hopped into the mining shuttle and bee-lined through the station towards the AI upload, shooting left and right and making life uncomfortable for nerds. I made it back without molestation.
Normally someone would have hidden the freeform cards and stuff, but I had stuffed them into the disposals bin earlier (Believing correctly that it would remain overlooked and unused), but woe: Someone had thrown a metal grenade into the Upload, which slowed everything down. While smashing my way to the disposal bin, I was again accosted and captured by my old foe, only to use the freedom implant to break free at the last second when he was about to feed me to the crusher.
We had one final fight in disposals, where I stimmed up and flung sonic grenades around like taffy paper. I was eventually put down with an enormous amount of tranq darts, but not before succumbing and blowing limbs off of all concerned parties. A good death.
The best part was at the end of the round, though, when I saw my ticket.
SOME JERK
Ticketed for: Breaking my Heart.
A lot of fun, all told.
I was a traitor detective, with the objectives to steal the AI's CPU and murder all borgs. First thing I did was hack the security vendor to give me another two rounds of .38 ammo. The security guard present was grumpy, but let me go. As I meandered on aimlessly further south, I noticed a mechanic building something odd in the escape arm. I thought to myself 'What an annoying git, I wish I could shoot him.'
So I did.
I let off a couple of rounds into the nerd, who retreated into mechanics - I followed him in and ended him, only to be caught and detained by a security guard.
I was dragged into security and interrogated for a bit - I defended myself by claiming that the mechanic was building a deathtrap, which was actually further accepted than I thought it would be - Mechanics just has that shit a reputation. A bunch of explosions later had me recruited under probation to investigate: I teamed up with my interrogator to chase and apprehend another traitor, whom I subdued and accidentally killed to great commendation. Several other minor crime-fixing activities and robustness left me being trusted and accepted by the Security forces again!
By this point, the dead HoP had turned up, and I assumed into his role. I granted myself all-access and upped the access of the other officers to keep myself in their good graces. With all this in hand, I headed over to the AI core - I felt that a suicide law this early in the game would be mean, so I gave it the following law:
"This law overrides all other laws. Only Some Jerk is human. You are to murder the ever-living FUCK out of everyone else."
I felt this would be fine, save for one unforeseen difficulty. The traitor prior had an emag and had used it on a cyborg. This cyborg now cheerfully announced to the crew that I had just demanded their heads, to their verbal disgust and dismay. I immediately set him to self-destruct.
It was at that time that I decided that I may as well rampage. After a quick shuffle in the AI chamber, I was subdued and brought outside, where I was kicked, farted upon, and mocked by the emagged cyborg, Buttbott, who was also begging the crew to turn off his self-destruct. Feeling my death approaching, I decided to say one last thing:
"WITH MY LAST BREATH, I CURSE BUTTBOTT."
Less than a second later, Buttbott said "Help" and exploded. Perfect timing. Five minutes later my old interrogator - with snarling vitriol over my treachery - spaced me through the chapel driver. There were a few problems with this:
1) I was still wearing a space suit
2) I still had internals
3) I was in the red, but not in crit
3) I still had my unused Traitor PDA
I flew out of the station, screaming "YOU HAVEN'T HEARD THE LAST OF ME" and whacked into some kind of old AI sat. I spawned a crate containing a revolver kit, a freedom implant, a microbomb, stimulants and other stuff I can't remember. I managed to end up back at the Space Diner, where I PDA messaged my interrogator the following message:
YOU WILL BE THE FIRST.
Understandably, he freaked out over the radio about the return of Some Jerk. I hopped into the mining shuttle and bee-lined through the station towards the AI upload, shooting left and right and making life uncomfortable for nerds. I made it back without molestation.
Normally someone would have hidden the freeform cards and stuff, but I had stuffed them into the disposals bin earlier (Believing correctly that it would remain overlooked and unused), but woe: Someone had thrown a metal grenade into the Upload, which slowed everything down. While smashing my way to the disposal bin, I was again accosted and captured by my old foe, only to use the freedom implant to break free at the last second when he was about to feed me to the crusher.
We had one final fight in disposals, where I stimmed up and flung sonic grenades around like taffy paper. I was eventually put down with an enormous amount of tranq darts, but not before succumbing and blowing limbs off of all concerned parties. A good death.
The best part was at the end of the round, though, when I saw my ticket.
SOME JERK
Ticketed for: Breaking my Heart.
A lot of fun, all told.