Give the CE a pet.

[A4Brogan]

Well, seeing how the entirety of engineering either accidently sets the whole station into a fireball in a large steel tube in space, or intentionally make a near-solar-great hot engine to make all the money, I say we have either a bottle containing a living Fire Elemental, or a lamp with a Fire Djinn. Any NON-CE attempting to pick up or otherwise damage either or will break/unleash the captured entity, and cause chaos with flinging fireballs everywhere before hiding in another container of any size nearby.

The cycle repeats: Anyone disturbing the container, be it box, crate, or locker, angers the sentient heat source, and causes it to unleash hellfire on the foolish mortal.