Goonhub
01-11-2013, 09:11 AM
I was a botanist. I grew lots of wheat and sugar cane and sent it to the kitchen. The AI joined in and started greeting everyone with "Another ____ has joined! ____, go to the kitchen for free cake!"
A scientist walks in. "Hey, can I borrow your watering can?" "Sure, man. I've got more in the back." He returns it later. Everything is fine.
Then botany explodes. Starting from that table in the middle with the weird hippie food. I, of course, being a botanist, am in botany, tending to the crops. So I'm dead.
An assistant grabs my corpse and drags me to genetics. I am cloned quickly and efficiently, a strange concept for genetics. I strip my corpse and put my clothes on my new body. I walk out of genetics.
"Hey Don, I can patch you up." He analyzes my health and injects me with something. My health goes up to 100%.
Extreme levels of radiation detected approaching the station. All personnel have 53.3 seconds to enter a maintenance tunnel or radiation safezone. This is not a test.
"Quick! To maintenance!" I run to the medbay's maintenance as I was trained to do. The scientist follows.
You have been injected with 30 units of sedative.
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
Later
OOC: Infinite Monkeys: this is dumb
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Anomaly Alert
Our sensors have sighted a shuttle of phantom George Melons clones about to seriously fuck up the station.
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Meteor Alert
Class 17 meteor shower approaching from the north. Impact in three minutes.
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Meteor Alert
Class 14 meteor shower approaching from the west. Impact in three minutes.
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Meteor Alert
Class 19 meteor shower approaching from the north. Impact in three minutes.
Alert: The emergency shuttle has been called. It will arrive in 10 minutes.
Clone generation process initiated.
This will take a moment, please hold.
Your icons have been generated!
You begin to recover.
A man in a spacesuit drags me out of the genetics room and into a maintenance tunnel.
Jacob Campbell says, "Welp"
Leonardo Biery [145.9] gasps, "help"
Jacob Campbell says, "Didn't realize the shuttle was here so soon"
Solo [145.9] declares, "Defend yourself!"
Adam Holdeman [145.9] asks, "Has the AI been reset?"
David Bailey [145.9] says, "It's a shotgun, Chris."
Jacob Campbell says, "And the AI has bolted and locked all the doors from h ere to there"
You feel a powerful shock course through your body!
Leonardo Biery [145.9] gasps, "ai please"
Jacob Campbell says, "Shocked and bolted"
The AI laws are reset. The doors unlock. The shuttle leaves.
![[Image: pEZyU.png]](http://i.imgur.com/pEZyU.png)
A scientist walks in. "Hey, can I borrow your watering can?" "Sure, man. I've got more in the back." He returns it later. Everything is fine.
Then botany explodes. Starting from that table in the middle with the weird hippie food. I, of course, being a botanist, am in botany, tending to the crops. So I'm dead.
An assistant grabs my corpse and drags me to genetics. I am cloned quickly and efficiently, a strange concept for genetics. I strip my corpse and put my clothes on my new body. I walk out of genetics.
"Hey Don, I can patch you up." He analyzes my health and injects me with something. My health goes up to 100%.
Extreme levels of radiation detected approaching the station. All personnel have 53.3 seconds to enter a maintenance tunnel or radiation safezone. This is not a test.
"Quick! To maintenance!" I run to the medbay's maintenance as I was trained to do. The scientist follows.
You have been injected with 30 units of sedative.
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
_______ beats you on the head with the fire extinguisher
Later
OOC: Infinite Monkeys: this is dumb
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Anomaly Alert
Our sensors have sighted a shuttle of phantom George Melons clones about to seriously fuck up the station.
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Meteor Alert
Class 17 meteor shower approaching from the north. Impact in three minutes.
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Meteor Alert
Class 14 meteor shower approaching from the west. Impact in three minutes.
Grand Galactic Corporate Update
Meteor Alert
Class 19 meteor shower approaching from the north. Impact in three minutes.
Alert: The emergency shuttle has been called. It will arrive in 10 minutes.
Clone generation process initiated.
This will take a moment, please hold.
Your icons have been generated!
You begin to recover.
A man in a spacesuit drags me out of the genetics room and into a maintenance tunnel.
Jacob Campbell says, "Welp"
Leonardo Biery [145.9] gasps, "help"
Jacob Campbell says, "Didn't realize the shuttle was here so soon"
Solo [145.9] declares, "Defend yourself!"
Adam Holdeman [145.9] asks, "Has the AI been reset?"
David Bailey [145.9] says, "It's a shotgun, Chris."
Jacob Campbell says, "And the AI has bolted and locked all the doors from h ere to there"
You feel a powerful shock course through your body!
Leonardo Biery [145.9] gasps, "ai please"
Jacob Campbell says, "Shocked and bolted"
The AI laws are reset. The doors unlock. The shuttle leaves.