Goonhub
06-22-2014, 09:50 PM
Usual Character Name: Reginald Hempmaster III
BYOND Username: TheHman03
Recommended by (if applicable): Austin Feufer
Times Available: Most Times during the night/early morning.
Reason for Application (300 word minimum): Gather round children, for here ye realize that i be tellin' the story of the past few days leading up to me application. A regular security officer different than no other before me i was, standing around the table in the middle of security, talking with my friends and remembering the way it used to be, none of this turnin' around and walkin' back to the other side, we loved the days when we could do a full circle around the station, aye. But as the day wore on i decided to go for a walk, when i did, i suddenly found myself paralyzed, shocked from behind like a bolt of lightning had just run down me spinal cord. I was assured that these would be my last moments, his gas masked face stood above me, his hands held a sword that shined like no other, this man was an enemy of the station, and i could do nothing about it. When suddenly from across the hall i heard something, a big red man standing there, muttering thigns and slurring his words, his words shook the hall as they came out: " FUggh you mudder fuggher." the hand of justice was dealt swiftly, and soon after it came a hurricane as the mystery man farted on my assailant's face.
Truthfully though, There has been an influx of shitty security officers recently, and these people require a person to look up to and say " man i really shouldn't permabrig that guy for farting on a clown". I've seen street beatings, riot launchers used as tasers, lockers being kept open or unlocked and officers holding their weapons in their hands instead of a belt or in a backpack recently. I've tried telling them not to do that but it quickly gets me a stun or a "fuck off", and that's just uncalled for. Being a HoS would allow me to mentor these young officers into something far better than they would be if they were learning from experience, and who knows, maybe a security gimmick once in a while. I think i would make security a less hated role to play for newer people.
Security Experience (300 word minimum): My security experience has been rather up and down from my beginning, i started out like most others did, weapons out, locker unlocked, super cop and zero fun attitude, but from then i have grown, i have been a good officer, taking part in security gimmicks headed by a HoS, letting traitors go early on, having a dance off with Redbeard Rum when i arrested him as a detective, and generally being a cool dude. An example: I walk in on a traitor just getting his gear out at round start, i tell him to be more careful in the future and go on my merry way, both parties pleased and the round is more likely to be fun than a snore fest. Another Example: Rather than being a shithead asshole officer, when i walked into a spy meeting that wanted to implant the current HoS, instead of screaming for help and arresting them all, i accepted my fate and had a nice, albeit short round with this band of evil men. What really would be the point of calling them out that early? There would be no point, just to make oneself feel larger in their mind. I usually have to deal with people calling me out as a bad officer when they steal my things and i give them a short sentence, if they do rack up a long sentence, i will usually challenge them to a dance off and if they win, they get out early. It's like an actual test for actual prizes! I have never permabrigged someone, and, if i was forced to in the case of an operative, changeling or vampire, they could easily get out by beating me in a dance off, telling a good joke or a bunch of other random tests that i make up, because i'm a professional fun haver.
In your opinion, what are the flaws and benefits of the current security layout (brig, cells, security room etc): Let's see, the tree outside the main door makes it easy to get into the foyer, and with that being the only viable way out opposed to a quick jolt through the bathroom wall or a ride on disposals, makes it a bit difficult to get out without them getting in, secondly,the table in the center of the main room makes a perfect way to get someone to chase one around and around, until they can get out of the room. Now onto what i do like: The brig, it looks nice, has alot of open room for prisoner capacity and has a quick and easy disposal chute method of parole, love it.
Your opinion of Shrek (5 word minimum): Now son, let me tell you about the ogres and the donkeys, ogres are like onions, they have layers and smell like shit, donkeys are like asses, they are called that and smell like shit.
Previous Bans (While this will not affect your application lying about it will): Permaban for my friend stealing my keyboard and typing an idiotic statement, jobban from AI and Cyborg for being really shit one day while i was really tired, both have been lifted.
BYOND Username: TheHman03
Recommended by (if applicable): Austin Feufer
Times Available: Most Times during the night/early morning.
Reason for Application (300 word minimum): Gather round children, for here ye realize that i be tellin' the story of the past few days leading up to me application. A regular security officer different than no other before me i was, standing around the table in the middle of security, talking with my friends and remembering the way it used to be, none of this turnin' around and walkin' back to the other side, we loved the days when we could do a full circle around the station, aye. But as the day wore on i decided to go for a walk, when i did, i suddenly found myself paralyzed, shocked from behind like a bolt of lightning had just run down me spinal cord. I was assured that these would be my last moments, his gas masked face stood above me, his hands held a sword that shined like no other, this man was an enemy of the station, and i could do nothing about it. When suddenly from across the hall i heard something, a big red man standing there, muttering thigns and slurring his words, his words shook the hall as they came out: " FUggh you mudder fuggher." the hand of justice was dealt swiftly, and soon after it came a hurricane as the mystery man farted on my assailant's face.
Truthfully though, There has been an influx of shitty security officers recently, and these people require a person to look up to and say " man i really shouldn't permabrig that guy for farting on a clown". I've seen street beatings, riot launchers used as tasers, lockers being kept open or unlocked and officers holding their weapons in their hands instead of a belt or in a backpack recently. I've tried telling them not to do that but it quickly gets me a stun or a "fuck off", and that's just uncalled for. Being a HoS would allow me to mentor these young officers into something far better than they would be if they were learning from experience, and who knows, maybe a security gimmick once in a while. I think i would make security a less hated role to play for newer people.
Security Experience (300 word minimum): My security experience has been rather up and down from my beginning, i started out like most others did, weapons out, locker unlocked, super cop and zero fun attitude, but from then i have grown, i have been a good officer, taking part in security gimmicks headed by a HoS, letting traitors go early on, having a dance off with Redbeard Rum when i arrested him as a detective, and generally being a cool dude. An example: I walk in on a traitor just getting his gear out at round start, i tell him to be more careful in the future and go on my merry way, both parties pleased and the round is more likely to be fun than a snore fest. Another Example: Rather than being a shithead asshole officer, when i walked into a spy meeting that wanted to implant the current HoS, instead of screaming for help and arresting them all, i accepted my fate and had a nice, albeit short round with this band of evil men. What really would be the point of calling them out that early? There would be no point, just to make oneself feel larger in their mind. I usually have to deal with people calling me out as a bad officer when they steal my things and i give them a short sentence, if they do rack up a long sentence, i will usually challenge them to a dance off and if they win, they get out early. It's like an actual test for actual prizes! I have never permabrigged someone, and, if i was forced to in the case of an operative, changeling or vampire, they could easily get out by beating me in a dance off, telling a good joke or a bunch of other random tests that i make up, because i'm a professional fun haver.
In your opinion, what are the flaws and benefits of the current security layout (brig, cells, security room etc): Let's see, the tree outside the main door makes it easy to get into the foyer, and with that being the only viable way out opposed to a quick jolt through the bathroom wall or a ride on disposals, makes it a bit difficult to get out without them getting in, secondly,the table in the center of the main room makes a perfect way to get someone to chase one around and around, until they can get out of the room. Now onto what i do like: The brig, it looks nice, has alot of open room for prisoner capacity and has a quick and easy disposal chute method of parole, love it.
Your opinion of Shrek (5 word minimum): Now son, let me tell you about the ogres and the donkeys, ogres are like onions, they have layers and smell like shit, donkeys are like asses, they are called that and smell like shit.
Previous Bans (While this will not affect your application lying about it will): Permaban for my friend stealing my keyboard and typing an idiotic statement, jobban from AI and Cyborg for being really shit one day while i was really tired, both have been lifted.