Goonhub
10-05-2024, 05:13 PM
Whether from going over an individual's ban through to major game development decisions and the details of their implementation, I've had to weigh up how much I care about the topic against the energy drain that is going to be having snarky snipes thrown my way, all the way to having stuff I work on and have enjoyed working on insulted.
This isn't to say I don't welcome criticism; I do. This wasn't criticism, though, but just a snarky beat-down, where it felt like I had two choices: take the high ground and be polite and professional back, and just wait for the next time, or step away.
More recently I'd felt like I couldn't talk about anything in any of the admin channels, because it could be sliced-and-diced and taken out of context and then used to weaponize the playerbase against a strawman version of my stance.
I understand the desire from players for transparency. I assure you, truly, that you do not want a window into the kinds of things we have to deal with from the players on a daily basis. You deserve better than getting a tiny, inflammatory slice of what goes on shown to you or brought up with the purpose of causing outrage.
The threat of having the people for whom I actually try to make the game safer, better, and more fun up in arms against me because of fires Zamu stoked has had me having to be guarded in what I say, and frankly I've been so detached from development in part because of it.
I've not felt empowered to do what I want to do without tacking on double the time that takes in heated, one-sided arguments. I didn't realize it would be quite so striking, but I haven't felt that way since we showed Zamu the door.
Sorry, Zamu. I know you're going through a lot, but you made being an admin not only not-fun but like a second job. I've come close to quitting several times because of it, and took numerous breaks from it as well. I'm sorry we couldn't do this sooner, rather than drag it out for you, as clearly none of us were having fun with it.
This isn't to say I don't welcome criticism; I do. This wasn't criticism, though, but just a snarky beat-down, where it felt like I had two choices: take the high ground and be polite and professional back, and just wait for the next time, or step away.
More recently I'd felt like I couldn't talk about anything in any of the admin channels, because it could be sliced-and-diced and taken out of context and then used to weaponize the playerbase against a strawman version of my stance.
I understand the desire from players for transparency. I assure you, truly, that you do not want a window into the kinds of things we have to deal with from the players on a daily basis. You deserve better than getting a tiny, inflammatory slice of what goes on shown to you or brought up with the purpose of causing outrage.
The threat of having the people for whom I actually try to make the game safer, better, and more fun up in arms against me because of fires Zamu stoked has had me having to be guarded in what I say, and frankly I've been so detached from development in part because of it.
I've not felt empowered to do what I want to do without tacking on double the time that takes in heated, one-sided arguments. I didn't realize it would be quite so striking, but I haven't felt that way since we showed Zamu the door.
Sorry, Zamu. I know you're going through a lot, but you made being an admin not only not-fun but like a second job. I've come close to quitting several times because of it, and took numerous breaks from it as well. I'm sorry we couldn't do this sooner, rather than drag it out for you, as clearly none of us were having fun with it.