Idea: Security Contraband Scanner

[KikiMofo]

I legitimately don't want Security to be able to do this faster.

Same. Part of being sec is doing this stuff slowly so that way while you are distracted searching someone in one place someone else can be causing trouble in another place. If people could just scan someone quickly it would mean sec is moving around faster and that's just not what sec is to me.
Sec is Paul Blart, not Robocop being able to scan people with his eyes or whatever.