My ideas

[Superlagg]

• Ability to shake vending machines by clicking them w/ harm intent with an empty hand. Has a chance to vend shit for free but also tip the machine over on you
  

I like it! Maybe also add a chance of it vending a "secret" item, and occasionally purchased items could get jammed in there, needing a firm shake or buying something higher on the list to get it out.

• Trampolines. 
  

Could be interesting, especially if it'll interact with certain things. Things thrown onto it would bounce and continue flying, would let you jump a ways, moonboots and double-bouncing would smack you into the ceiling, always a chance to get caught in the springs and rails and have your limbs torn off and bouncing around on the trampoline...

• able to feed George treats 
  

Surprised this isnt already a thing. He's a good boy and deserves to be rewarded as such.

• IT Guy daily job who starts with everyones email info in his notes
  

Now if only anyone ever checked their emails.

• Throwing a sheet of paper can make it flit around and glide landing a couple tiles off center, maybe left or right.
  

Sounds reasonable, allows me to make a mess more efficiently. Maybe also extend this to cards, and paper stuff flung via Mechanics.

Bonus points if it interacts with atmos to modulate the trajectory based on gas pressure and composition, allowing it to fly straight through airless tiles, blow around if there's a pressure gradient nearby, and set both server and coder ablaze.

• Paper crafts
  

I *think* there's something like this already, but I haven't played with paper any time recently, so I'm not too sure. Definitely aren't any paper shurikens and waterbombs, that's for sure.

• Sprinting/slipping with scissors can make you trip and kill you/ do a shitton of damage
  

If you aren't wearing eyegear, slipping with scissors should gouge out one of your eyes and move it into your eye slot. The scissors, not the gouged eye.