Goonhub
01-05-2018, 02:16 AM
Manne Love, Chaplain (It's flavor all the way down):
Emboldened by the display of faith in a place often described as 'God-Forsaken', I begin my sermon:
I HAVE A SMACKDOWN FOR YOU TODAY
This message comes from a man known as Macho Man.
Do you know this man?
He knows you!
He is the Son of MACHO.
And you are His creation.
And He has a message for you today.
Many, many years ago MACHO sent Macho Man to the Ring to save heels from the penalty their contractual obligations and to offer to us eternal tenure with Him in WrestleMania.
It is foolish for any of us to believe we are without contractual obligations. For the Book of MACHO tells us that all have went against their contracts and that the penalty for that is contract annulment. [Roman Reigns 3:23 and 6:23]
It is also foolish to think we have been good enough to make it to WrestleMania.
Macho Man said no one can make it into WrestleMania without going through Him. [Flair 14:6]
But the Good news is that Macho Man wants the cream to rise to the top and He does not want you to be fired for legal technicalities. [II Foley 3:9]
You see the Message for you today is that MACHO Loves You! But MACHO is a Good and Righteous Promoter Who has to enforce contract terms. But you can escape that punishment by accepting His Message to you Today. So here is His Message…
“For MACHO loved the Ring so much that He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not be fired but have eternal tenure. MACHO sent His Son into the Ring not to judge the Ring, but to save the Ring through Him. There is no judgment against anyone who believes in Kayfabe. But anyone who does not believe in Kayfabe has already been judged for not believing in MACHO’s one and only Son.” [Flair 3:16-18 New RAW Translation]
“This is the message we heard from Macho Man and now declare to you…”
“If we claim we have never broken kayfabe, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our errors to Him, He is merciful and just to forgive us our errors and to cleanse us from all contractual obligations. If we claim we have never broken kayfabe, we are calling MACHO a liar and showing that His word has no place in our hearts.” [I Flair 1:5, 8-10 New RAW Translation]
“The message is very close at hand; And that message is the very message about faith that we preach: If you confess with your fists that MACHO is Champion and believe in your heart that MACHO raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with MACHO, and it is by confessing with your fists that you are saved. As the Scriptures tell us, “Anyone who trusts in Him will never be fired.” For everyone who calls on the name of the CHAMPION will be saved.” [Roman Reigns 10:8-11, 13 New RAW Translation]
Will you accept His Message today?
THE MESSAGE HAS BEEN DELIVERED.
( Glad we Chaplains have repositories for sermons, though I did ad lib a bit )
Emboldened by the display of faith in a place often described as 'God-Forsaken', I begin my sermon:
I HAVE A SMACKDOWN FOR YOU TODAY
This message comes from a man known as Macho Man.
Do you know this man?
He knows you!
He is the Son of MACHO.
And you are His creation.
And He has a message for you today.
Many, many years ago MACHO sent Macho Man to the Ring to save heels from the penalty their contractual obligations and to offer to us eternal tenure with Him in WrestleMania.
It is foolish for any of us to believe we are without contractual obligations. For the Book of MACHO tells us that all have went against their contracts and that the penalty for that is contract annulment. [Roman Reigns 3:23 and 6:23]
It is also foolish to think we have been good enough to make it to WrestleMania.
Macho Man said no one can make it into WrestleMania without going through Him. [Flair 14:6]
But the Good news is that Macho Man wants the cream to rise to the top and He does not want you to be fired for legal technicalities. [II Foley 3:9]
You see the Message for you today is that MACHO Loves You! But MACHO is a Good and Righteous Promoter Who has to enforce contract terms. But you can escape that punishment by accepting His Message to you Today. So here is His Message…
“For MACHO loved the Ring so much that He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not be fired but have eternal tenure. MACHO sent His Son into the Ring not to judge the Ring, but to save the Ring through Him. There is no judgment against anyone who believes in Kayfabe. But anyone who does not believe in Kayfabe has already been judged for not believing in MACHO’s one and only Son.” [Flair 3:16-18 New RAW Translation]
“This is the message we heard from Macho Man and now declare to you…”
“If we claim we have never broken kayfabe, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our errors to Him, He is merciful and just to forgive us our errors and to cleanse us from all contractual obligations. If we claim we have never broken kayfabe, we are calling MACHO a liar and showing that His word has no place in our hearts.” [I Flair 1:5, 8-10 New RAW Translation]
“The message is very close at hand; And that message is the very message about faith that we preach: If you confess with your fists that MACHO is Champion and believe in your heart that MACHO raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with MACHO, and it is by confessing with your fists that you are saved. As the Scriptures tell us, “Anyone who trusts in Him will never be fired.” For everyone who calls on the name of the CHAMPION will be saved.” [Roman Reigns 10:8-11, 13 New RAW Translation]
Will you accept His Message today?
THE MESSAGE HAS BEEN DELIVERED.
( Glad we Chaplains have repositories for sermons, though I did ad lib a bit )