Goonhub
09-02-2017, 11:17 PM
NateTheSquid (Captain) (2) + Noah Buttes (Clown) (1) vs. New525 (Syndicate) (3) + Superlagg (Assistant) (2) vs. Winklabom (Mime) (5):Oh boy, this one's gonna be a doozy...uh...
Winklabom successfully Mime's the clown and the syndicate together in a small box to sort out their differences.
Superlagg attempts to transfer his energy into New525. Nothing happens.
New525, after being prevented from reaching the climax of his character arc, angrily proceeds to sprint into the clown, knocking him over, and then beats the shit out of his face, cracking the mask pretty badly. Once he's done, he forcefully activates his Macrobomb early. The sheer force is enough to break the invisible wall.
Nate, who is currently in the cockpit, notices literally none of this happening.
Alert! Everyone on the shuttle not in security, medical, or the cockpit must roll for damage! Due to Noah's location to the syndicate, he automatically roles a 1, gibbing him in the process.
1's, Gibbed: Noah Buttes (Automatic), New525 (Automatic)
2's, Lose an arm and a leg: Nesmettaur (4, not your robot arm), Vitatroll, Hydrofloric
3's, Lose a leg: None
4's, Lose an arm: Winklabom, elan_oots
5's, Badly damaged: None
6's, Unharmed: Superlagg, Lord Birb's mini-bot.
Exempt: Berrik (Arrested), NateTheSquid (In the Cockpit)
Berrik (Handcuffed, 6): The handcuffs appear to be slightly larger than they're supposed to be. They slide off.
You quickly swipe and begin eating the HoS's hat without anyone noticing.
It tastes like the bitter taste of justice.
HotCoffeeMug (Crit Check, irrelevant) (2): You adminhelp to be let on the shuttle.
After a short time, you get a message.
"Sorry, but you missed it, and there's nothing I can do about it. Try to get to it next round."
NesMettaur (3): You proceed to get up on the chair, using the chaos to your advantage to body slam as many people as people.
You successfully down two random people before being caught in an explosion, losing an arm and a leg.
Ow.
Bologna Prime (2):You activate the teleporter and immediately jump inside.
You find yourself in the brig.
Probably should have calibrated that first.
Lord Birb (4): You immediately attempt to assess what is happening.
Several people seem to have made their way onto the shuttle, with some assistance and detriment on several key crew members efforts.
A syndicate member and the clown appear to get into a one sided fight before the syndicate suddenly explodes. Luckily, you were far enough away to not be affected.
Several crew members are now in pain, missing limbs, and/or straight up dead.
Frank Stein (3): You radio over security to see if you can be teleported on via the port-a-brig.
Apparently, due to the anti teleportation fields on the shuttle, this would be impossible.
Dang.
Vitatroll (6): You succeed in...whatever you're doing?
I have no freaking idea.
Seems like a waste of a perfectly good 6.
Despite this amazing success, you get caught in an explosion that rips off an arm and a leg.
Flourish (6): Incredibly angry at the situation at hand, you search for another monkey and UTTERLY BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF IT!
Good god!
This scene is way too graphic for me to type out of fear for tainting our virgin reading eyes.
In the aftermath, the monkey has been thoroughly grounded into paste.
Jesus christ.
Studenterhue (1): Oh sweet christ the addiction is already kicking in.
You eject your entire lunch all over the floor.
Good god that stung.
Final Results:
Station victory!
Survivors: 20/21 (95%, A)
Escapees: 7/21 (33%, F)
Syndicates killed before shuttle arrival: 1/3 (33%, F)
Clown Abuse: Not enough.
Overall: 53%, F
Comment: That's...uh...that's a lot of braindead.
Winklabom successfully Mime's the clown and the syndicate together in a small box to sort out their differences.
Superlagg attempts to transfer his energy into New525. Nothing happens.
New525, after being prevented from reaching the climax of his character arc, angrily proceeds to sprint into the clown, knocking him over, and then beats the shit out of his face, cracking the mask pretty badly. Once he's done, he forcefully activates his Macrobomb early. The sheer force is enough to break the invisible wall.
Nate, who is currently in the cockpit, notices literally none of this happening.
Alert! Everyone on the shuttle not in security, medical, or the cockpit must roll for damage! Due to Noah's location to the syndicate, he automatically roles a 1, gibbing him in the process.
1's, Gibbed: Noah Buttes (Automatic), New525 (Automatic)
2's, Lose an arm and a leg: Nesmettaur (4, not your robot arm), Vitatroll, Hydrofloric
3's, Lose a leg: None
4's, Lose an arm: Winklabom, elan_oots
5's, Badly damaged: None
6's, Unharmed: Superlagg, Lord Birb's mini-bot.
Exempt: Berrik (Arrested), NateTheSquid (In the Cockpit)
Berrik (Handcuffed, 6): The handcuffs appear to be slightly larger than they're supposed to be. They slide off.
You quickly swipe and begin eating the HoS's hat without anyone noticing.
It tastes like the bitter taste of justice.
HotCoffeeMug (Crit Check, irrelevant) (2): You adminhelp to be let on the shuttle.
After a short time, you get a message.
"Sorry, but you missed it, and there's nothing I can do about it. Try to get to it next round."
NesMettaur (3): You proceed to get up on the chair, using the chaos to your advantage to body slam as many people as people.
You successfully down two random people before being caught in an explosion, losing an arm and a leg.
Ow.
Bologna Prime (2):You activate the teleporter and immediately jump inside.
You find yourself in the brig.
Probably should have calibrated that first.
Lord Birb (4): You immediately attempt to assess what is happening.
Several people seem to have made their way onto the shuttle, with some assistance and detriment on several key crew members efforts.
A syndicate member and the clown appear to get into a one sided fight before the syndicate suddenly explodes. Luckily, you were far enough away to not be affected.
Several crew members are now in pain, missing limbs, and/or straight up dead.
Frank Stein (3): You radio over security to see if you can be teleported on via the port-a-brig.
Apparently, due to the anti teleportation fields on the shuttle, this would be impossible.
Dang.
Vitatroll (6): You succeed in...whatever you're doing?
I have no freaking idea.
Seems like a waste of a perfectly good 6.
Despite this amazing success, you get caught in an explosion that rips off an arm and a leg.
Flourish (6): Incredibly angry at the situation at hand, you search for another monkey and UTTERLY BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF IT!
Good god!
This scene is way too graphic for me to type out of fear for tainting our virgin reading eyes.
In the aftermath, the monkey has been thoroughly grounded into paste.
Jesus christ.
Studenterhue (1): Oh sweet christ the addiction is already kicking in.
You eject your entire lunch all over the floor.
Good god that stung.
Final Results:
Station victory!
Survivors: 20/21 (95%, A)
Escapees: 7/21 (33%, F)
Syndicates killed before shuttle arrival: 1/3 (33%, F)
Clown Abuse: Not enough.
Overall: 53%, F
Comment: That's...uh...that's a lot of braindead.