Goonstation September 2024 Contribution Contest

[RoyalPes]

Discoun' Dans Bumpkin Latte
15u pumpkin latte
15u VHFCS (5u more cause corn syrup)
10u Beer (cause wheat)
10u Bourbon (also cause corn)
"A taste from the farm and clogged arteries" 
(also thought of a farm/scottish mix, using Iron Brew.. something with "freedom" in the title) 

Dracula Dans Bloodkin Latte (name can be changed, it's not the best but "Bloody Mary's Pumpkin Latte", isn't any better)
15u pumpkin latte
10u VHFCS
10u Synthflesh
10u Blood
5u Hemolymph 
"The rumours of Vlad going missing in the pumpkin latte grinder room are not true"
(maybe when it comes closer to halloween have an EXTREMELY small chance for the hemolymph to be replaced by vampire syrum)
(cause then they would be a vamp.. but technically not an antag? just a fun round gimmick)

I tried my best

Which one is your official entry?

oh whoops sorry i didnt see a reply, uh the first one is my official entry i guess

[Xkallubar]

(maybe when it comes closer to halloween have an EXTREMELY small chance for the hemolymph to be replaced by vampire syrum)
(cause then they would be a vamp.. but technically not an antag? just a fun round gimmick)

FYI most disease reagents, including vampire serum, need you to have 5.9u of the reagent in your body at once.

[Snoid]

Hi, the fall and winter seasons are prime for festivities, but many ignore the dangers of the restless spirits and wicked demons that the Halloween season brings. To help ward off the seasonal fiends, the Discount Dan™ Brand Franchise Conglomarate are proud to present:

Divine Daniel's Soul Cleansing Refresheverage

15u Pumpkin Spice Latte

15u VHFCS

10u Holy Water

7u Aconitine

5u Lavender Essence

2u Salt

0.5u Mutadone

0.5u Calomel

Ingredients consist of the standard Pumpkin Spice Latte and Discount Dan™ Brand Franchise Conglomarate Sweetener,  In addition to that, it contains Properly Priest Blessed Holy Water, an all-natural warder to fend off all kinds of evil spirits in addition to watering down the normally quite spicy Pumpkin Spice, which allows it to be enjoyed by a wider variety of Refresheverage Enjoyers. The Aconitine is a natural herbal remedy that tastes refreshing and additionally scares off potential Werewolves from coming near you. In the event of potential and theoretical poisoning you may or may not recieve from this ingredient, the Discount Dan™ Brand Franchise Conglomarate recommends you seek your local Chaplain to check if you may have been infected with lycanthropthy prior to injesting Divine Daniel's Soul Cleansing Refresheverage. The Lavender Essence that this drink also contains adds just a little more of that wonderful smell and taste. A pinch of salt does a wonderful job at adding some extra flavor and fending off spirits of dark intent when you pour the drink over your shoulder. Last but not least, Divine Daniel's Soul Cleansing Refresheverage contains some minor medical elements in its Mutadone and Calomel in order to purge you of any demons that may have infested your body or soul. The perfect drink for both flavor and utility!

[crunchwarp]

The Sure, Grandpa

Old Timers just don't understand the appeal of Pumpkin Spice. But Discount Dan's can't afford to sacrifice the precious, over-proportionally wealthy post-65 demographic!!!

That's why this fall, Discount Dan's is proud to introduce the "Sure, Grandpa", named for what you'll be saying after your pumpkin spice-hating friend takes a sip of this fine swill.

In fact, Discount Dan's is eager to remind you, through its "Anyone can Be a Grandpa" initiative, you need not even BE on the older side of the age bracket, nor a parent or grand to purchase this fine Product.  That's right, anyone, be they or autumnal grinch or grouchy grandparent, can bond in the end over Discount Dan's ™ Products!

And for those who prefer our more "traditional" pumpkin slice flavorings, well, whatever your friend or loved one says after drinking this will be roughly as comprehensible to your brain as "pumpkin spice" is to theirs.


2u Caledonium - Scottish
2u Essence of Elvis - Elvis Accent
2u Fleur-de-lys - Frontal Gyrus Q
2u Suomium - Finnish (currently artifact injectors only)
2u Swedium - Swedish
2u Innitium - Chav
2u Worcestershire Sauce - Frontal Gyrus Y
6u agenium
10u VHFCS
20u Pumpkin Spice Latte (because I find the idea of the one marketed as an alternative to pumpkin spice secretly having the most of it funny)


(Each of the 2u reagants give a accent for 3 minutes. After 3 minutes the accents will all miraculously expire together)

[SteveRooly]

My entry:
Discount Dan's introduces a chilling flavor of their brand new Pumpkin Spice Latte line...
The Pumpkin Ice Latte!

• 15u Pumpkin Spice Latte
  
• 10u Very-high-fructose Corn Syrup
  
• 5u Mint Tea
  
• 10u Cryostylane
  
• 5u Cryoxadone
  
• 2u Nicotine
  
• 1u Freeze
  

[Xturnal]

Station's a mess? Crew Coated in blood? No botany to provide the seasonal classic?
Try Discount Dan's Pumpkin Spice Scented Cleaner Flavored Pumpkin Spice!

Recommended by various people dressed in sciency lab coats!

ingredients:
25u base
10u space lube
5u space cleaner
5u space ipecac
3u phlog dust
2u superlube

[Spyritdragon]

Presenting: Discount Dan's Spiced Latte: Flamboyant Fluorange Flavour!
- 15u Pumpkin Spice Latte
- 10u VHFCS
- 10u carrot juice
- 5u cinnamon
- 5u orange juice
- 4u luminol
- 1u fluorine

[Whele]

Genescan Dan's Pumpkin Splice Latte
Flavor text: An ill-advised novelty coffee drink that MAY have temporary consequences for the integrity of your DNA.

15 units of pumpkin spice latte
10 units of very high fructose corn syrup (VHFCS)
10 units of mutini
8 units of banana milk
5 units of cinnamon
2 units of Three Mile Island Iced Tea

[JacobwWaltz]

Discount Dan's Unknowable Spice
A drink for those whom wish to experience ennui, and glimpse the unknowable in this autumn season.
This Drink is Proprietary, sharing of this ingredients list is strictly prohibited!
25 Units of Pumpkin Spice Latte
10 Units of Solipsizine
5 units of Cryostylane
5 units Ecto Cooler
5 units psylocybin.

Discount Dan's Consortium not responsible for meetings with supposed Eldritch beings or encounters with the dead.
Stock this new flavour on your station today to give your buyers an out of body experience!

[ProperPickle]

Discount Dan's Pumpkin Spice: Autumn Solitude
25u - Base Drink
15u - Solipsizine (finally... peace  )
5u - Vanilla (Yum 😋)
5u - Bourbon 

Bringing the classic feeling of drinking alone at home to the workplace!

[stupid rat]

Discount Dan's Utterly Wired Fall Brew


- 25u Base Drink
- 10u Cinnamon
- 5u Caffeine
- 5u George Melonium
- 2.5u LSD
- 2.5u Bath Salts

(Warning: This will probably fuck you up BIG TIME)


(unless you have good george melonium RNG)

[Berat0]

My entry:

Discount Dan's Pumpkin Spice Flavored Wake-Up Aid

This ''healthy'' concoction of ''nutrients'' mixed with the seasons staple flavour is guaranteed to keep you awake more than 12 hours! The best way to start your day!

Ingredients:

15u of Pumpkin Spice Latte
10u of VHFCS
15u of Caffeine
5u of Energy Drink
3u of Methamphetamine
2u of Expresso

[Guv Guvington]

Discount Dan's Trendy Influencer Latte

Contents:

15u - Pumpkin Space Latte █
10u - VHFCS █
11u - Cinnamon █
7u - Butter █
3u - Space Cleaner █
2u - Mirabilis █
1u - Expresso █
1u - Deep Fried Dabs █

Description:
"Years of intensive market research has culminated into this trendy flavor!"

Reasoning:
This flavour is a reference to obnoxious and dangerous internet trends, just how pumpkin spice latte is often criticised for beeing a "trend beverage, consumed by obnoxious people."

Cinnamon is not just a common latte ingredient, but also referencing the "cinnamon challenge".
Butter is representing fat, of which Starbucks pumpkin spice latte has plenty of.
Space cleaner is a reference to the "Tide Pod Challenge" or many other similiar internet "challenges", while also having practical use as emergency cleaner source if things get messy.
Mirabilis is supposed to represent the virality of trends (it also makes everyone who inspects the chems dab).
Expresso represents internet brainrot and low quality coffee.
Deep Fried Dabs is le funni internet trendé (also it means that every time you take a sip you are forced to dab which is funny to me).

The flavour is designed to be mostly harmless in one dose, but two servings in quick succession cause overdoses of cinnamon, cholesterol and space cleaner.

The lore explanation is Discount Dan looking up shitty internet trends in an attempt to create a trendy flavour that would be popular with the kids, without having any common sense.

[lyy]

Discount Dan's Pie-a-Palooza Latte


   • 25u Base Drink                                                              (pumpkin pie!)
   • 5u Cherry Juice   █                                                          (cherry pie!)
   • 5u Cider   █                                                           (fermented apple pie...?)
   • 3u Bread   █                                                                    (pie crust!)
   • 3u Cream   █                                                              (whipped cream!)
   • 3u Beff   █                                                                     (...meat pie.)
   • 3u Cheese Substitute   █                                             (...more meat pie.)
   • 3u Partially Hydrogenated Space-Soybean Oil   █       (...even MORE meat pie.)

A delightful blend of everyone's favorite autumnal pies! Mixing together the delicious and unique flavors of pumpkin, cherry, apple, and... m-meat... pie?

[Isane]

It's the Discount Dan's Back 2 School Latte! Featuring:

25u base drink
10u Chalk (School supplies!)
10u Paper (More school supplies!)
2u Mannitol (Heal Expand your brain with learning!)
3u Robustissin (For when you inevitably get sick from all the sniffling kids)