Best moments ever thread 2.0

[CaptainBravo]

the time i lit Roswell Pain, a vampire, on fire with an extinguisher at the exact moment his own pipebomb blew his arm off.

and then we beat his ass to death.

[Dauntasa]

the time i lit Roswell Pain, a vampire, on fire with an extinguisher at the exact moment his own pipebomb blew his arm off.

and then we beat his ass to death.

In the same round I, as a vampire, managed to self medicate myself out of crit after the AI lethal turreted me and escape the angry mob that it drew there to kill me(against the law I gave it, I might add) by dropping a chemical bomb in the middle of it and running away. Then a new angry mob formed in medbay and I did the same thing. By the end of the round you could tell the places where I'd been by the scorchmarks, severed arms and ominous red glow.

[storm1911]

(some random dude) the captain is shit!

Aaron Clewett (Me):well time to finish this with my pipe bomb and microbombs

Aaron Clewett: [Radio] THE CAPTAIN IS A CONDOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!
*Explosions*
DEAD.Aaron Clewett: Its not about the kill,its about the message

[Klayboxx]

(some random dude) the captain is shit!

Aaron Clewett (Me):well time to finish this with my pipe bomb and microbombs

Aaron Clewett: [Radio] THE CAPTAIN IS A CONDOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!
*Explosions*
DEAD.Aaron Clewett: Its not about the kill,its about the message

Yeah and the ironic part is that while THAT explosion didn't kill me, I ultimately was finished off with a pipe bomb.

[TheRedScare]

Did you catch that one too?

[Weavel]

HELP: You: help i ordered my mindslaves to beat me to death with money and then implanted myself and told myself to not resist i am not a traitor wtf
Admin PM from-Atomicthumbs: what

[Frenchchef]

This was actually a year or two ago, but I remember it now and it was pretty cool. I was a Captain and after a few tussles with the syndicate throughout the round, I hatched a scheme. I hid two security officers and an HoP in some of the offices on the bridge, going onto the bridge and staying for a bit. Three of them came and they broke in, and my officers came out in a bloody gunfight. I was knocked down after firing my laser, and two syndicates were down and wounded, one critically. The other made a mad dash and one of the officers made a nearly impossible shot across the office, hitting him and knocking him down. That officer proceeded to strip him and hurl him into space, taking his e-sword and finishing the other two. Can't remember if we won right then or not, but damn it was cool.

[Weavel]

Isaac Kirkhope says, "HEY"
Isaac Kirkhope says, "MACHO WIZARD"
the machoh menn casually punts David Laserpanda away!
Isaac Kirkhope says, "HULK HOGAN WAS BETTER"
the machoh menn gloats and boasts!
Isaac Kirkhope says, "HULK HOGAN COULD KICK YOUR ASS"
machoh menn suddenly and violently vomits!
The machoh menn collapses!
Isaac Kirkhope has grabbed the machoh menn passively!
Isaac Kirkhope starts to put the machoh menn into the enzymatic reclaimer!
Isaac Kirkhope stuffs the machoh menn into the enzymatic reclaimer!
You activate the enzymatic reclaimer.

have you ever offended a macho wizard so hard he instantly falls to his knees vomiting

[Xeram]

Just now, Popecrunch was being silly and was giving fairly unused, ignored items great properties, through some testing, i immediately found that pens were suddenly instadeath weapons when thrown or poked with.

Some time passes, and i end up suggesting to him to make everyone traitors and watch the horror and confusion as traitors toss pens at each other in a desperate attempt to kill each other without getting hit, He absolutely loves the idea and makes it so.

Some time later, as a reward for the idea, he made me admin for a round.

Needless to say it was utter chaos in it's most beautiful form.

[Readster]

As a traitor captain I used a syndie dagger to take out my target in telescience while making a huge mess everywhere. Stuffed the body in a locker and then had a brilliant idea.
Quickly, I made a bomb with a signaller attached and placed it inside the locker under the body. I then ran back to the bridge and hopped onto the security cameras.
Informing the HoS, Luis Smith, of the huge mess in telescience, I asked him to investigate. Watching him slowly enter the room and wander around, I suggest that the blood does not leave the room and thus the body must be nearby. Cautiously I observe him approach the locker and open it. As he announces it over the radio and I see him begin to leave I hit the signaller in my free hand and Boom!
Sadly the bomb did not completely kill him, I had to walk down there myself and finish the job, almost dying myself, but it was all worth it at that point. Had my traitor round ended there I would have been satisfied with the success of my cunning trap and execution of Luis.
Sometimes a rampage isn't fun enough.
Sometimes you just need to creatively kill one person.

[Conor12]

Tickets: http://www.craftools.com/goonstationhub/

The whole ticket system and the reasons used are hilarious.

I was in the bar and a security officer threatened to fine an assistant. The assistant pushed him down and ran off with his PDA.

[atomic1fire]

Target: Terrell Wilkerson Issuer: Devin Jowers (Security Officer) Reason: Trying to wear an official ticket as a hat

Target: Terrell Wilkerson Issuer: Devin Jowers (Security Officer) Reason: Being a Clown

Target: Terrell Wilkerson Issuer: Mister Chike (Security Officer) Reason: Bloodying the execution chamber floor

Tickets are hilarious.

[Sundance]

I was rampaging as an evil mindslaved HoS
The highlight was when I started to issue tickets to people, when they pick it up their horror on their face when I pull out my gun and shotgun them in the face.

Sundance Feely says, "REAAAD ITTT"
Brayden Wood says, "official caution"
You reload Riot Shotgun with ammo from A-BG Baton Rounds. A-BG Baton Rounds has 1 rounds left.
Sundance Feely reloads Riot Shotgun.
Brayden Wood exclaims, "for living!"
Sundance Feely shoots Brayden Wood pointblank with the revolver!

[CaptainBravo]

made pepperoni foam that seemed to last around 2 minutes and spread over an enormous area

Philip Farmer helps Valterak Balmue onto the Buff-R-Matic 3000!
Vaughn Moon says, "weeee"
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
My goodness, that was tasty!
Dr. Kay says, "oi"
Dr. Kay says, "philip"
Vaughn Moon says, "PEPPERONIIIII"
Dr. Kay says, "stop that"
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
My goodness, that was tasty!
Dr. Kay [145.9] says, "Philip if you steal that body i will fuck you up"
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
Vaughn Moon says, "man this is some good shit"
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
My goodness, that was tasty!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
My goodness, that was tasty!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
Vaughn Moon says, "look at it go"
The snack machine beeps, "Fill the gap in your stomach right now!"
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
AlphaBetaCharlie Learning [145.9] states, "Luke Curry has signed up as Janitor."
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
My goodness, that was tasty!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
My goodness, that was tasty!
My goodness, that was tasty!
Vaughn Moon says, "oh my god it won't stop"
Vaughn Moon screams!
My goodness, that was tasty!
Isaac Kirkhope twitches.
Vaughn Moon burps.
My goodness, that was tasty!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
Vaughn Moon says, "IT DOESN'T END"
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
My goodness, that was tasty!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
A slice of pepperoni slaps you!
Vaughn Moon says, "aww"

glorious

[Readster]

PDA hacking may very well be the most under used useful thing in this game.

I started the round as a miner but didn't feel like mining so I went to the station and picked up a network cart for the hell of it. Using my knowledge of packets I hacked my way around the station.

I started the shift as a simple miner with naught but the overalls on his back.
I ended the shift as the king of the station with the rank of super captain, the detectives thermals, the AI's laws in my favour and the engine shutdown.

Not once did I break into anywhere or steal anything. Everything was handed to me, the ID, the thermals. I even had the AI open the doors and disable the turrets in its upload for me.
The PDA is truly the most powerful weapon.

I swindled the station of everything.