GET DAT FUKKEN DISK

[NesMettaur]

Huh? Did I do something? Why did everyone throw their headsets, was I just that loud?

Oh well! At least I can hear now! Components at the ready, I decide to travel up to the bar and find a good place in there to set up another teleporter.

[pizzatiger]

Due to the 4th wall of the armory blowing up, I realize that I need to triangulate the postion of the syndicate and nanotraisen HQ''s on the cargo delivery computer for the delivery of certain "packages" to keep the plot exciting.

I also yell at enginering to repair the 4th wall

[fosstar]

I attempt to hijack the radios from roomba to both stop the screaming and yell about the glory of communism

[Superlagg]

Heck's an authentication disk? I'm gonna authenticate my foot up their butt! Then I'm gonna seize the means of butt whoopin' and communize my foot up... communism's... butt? Does communism have a butt? How am I gonna kick it? I don't really pay for anything, does that mean I'm a communist? Gray next to blue makes it kind of a warm color... shit, I think I'm a communist. That sucks, but it means I have a zillion other people to share the suck with me. Maybe communism's not that bad.

!!!

Syndies wear red!

Red is the color of communism!

Syndies are communists!

!!?

I stop. Whatever mad I had in my head evaporated. Hold on. Who are we fighting? Are the Syndies bad, or are we the bad ones? Should a communist fight a communist? These are questions an assistant like me was never trained to answer. I look at the frosty glass of drugs in my hand.

Perhaps it is us who are the clowns. Clowns. The clown! Clowns wear red! So do shitcurity! Of course. How silly of me, Syndies aren't communists! They're Security Clowns!

I hold the glass high.

Superlagg [149.5] exclaims, "GLORIOUS AIMRADE! WHERE BEAST YONDER SYNDIKOVS? WE HAVINGCK A DRINKSKY OF WODKEY FOR YE SCURVY DOGS!"

[New525]

I walk into the main hall to find the clown and take two shots at anyone i see. One in the groin the other in the head

[Technature]

NateTheSquid: You ask why the hell you weren't borged after specifically being asked.  Several of the medical officers said that they weren't the ones to clone you.  Typical.
You put on your clothing and shove your things in your pockets and backpack, and then proceed to the robotics and demand you be borged.
"Uh...sir, I know you were...uh...dead when it was announced but, we're at code Nuclear right now.  We really need someone who can organize the station against the Nuclear Operatives."

Bologna Prime: You order sponge capsules instead of the Novelty clothing you really really wanted.  While you wait for them to arrive, you find the nearest fire extinguisher and spray it all on the outgoing conveyor belt.  As soon as the crate arrives, you grab it and head to the bathroom, where you fill the extinguisher with water.

Vitatroll (4): You head around in a direction being the lion you clearly are.
Even though in reality you're just crawling around screaming at people.

HotCoffeeMug (3): You head off to search for Nuclear Operatives.
You suddenly realize you have no idea where they could be.
You start from the escape shuttle area.  No luck so far.

Berrik (3): You get yourself on the nearest chair you can.
After about a minute, no one comes by.

Roomba (6): You head out to find and put on a stylish suit and Top hat.
You look absolutely dashing.

Lord Birb (6): You successfully lock down all the doors in the room the Nuke Op is currently in.
These guys never come alone.  There have to be more.

Winklabom (n/a): You take your headset and prepare to leave when a security officer comes in...and then immediately leaves.
Apparently, there are more important things than someone yelling in the radio to attend to.

LuigiThirty (4): You start adding chemicals to the chili peppers in an attempt to make them explosive.
After a couple of tests, you successfully make a few explosive chili peppers.
You now have two explosive chili peppers.

NesMettaur (6): Everyone looks a little horrified.  The ringing in your ears subside and you ask what's going on.
"You IDIOT!  Do you have any idea what you just did?  We're under code nuclear right now!"
Uh...oh boy.  That was not a good time to announce you have the key to blowing everyone up.
You decide to assist in the situation by heading to the bar to construct another teleporter.

pizzatiger (5): This game is getting really strange.  You read that it was supposed to be about space people doing space things with the occasional antagonist, and the Nuclear Operations syndicates definitely fit in with that, but there's people yelling weird things into microphones for no reason, clown's that randomly may or may not exist, budgets being transferred for trivial reasons, and what the hell is with this Communism and Capitalism bullshit?  You send a message to the Admin's if this is normal and, while slightly crazier than usual, get told that this is pretty par for the course.
You're not sure how you feel about this answer.
Anyways, you attempt to and successfully locate a small syndicate base nearby.  Further examinations reveal it's in an asteroid.
You already know where Nanotrasen's HQ is due to Lord Birb's files.
You also remind engineering that there's a hole in the armory and that they need to do their fucking job.


fosstar (3): You start hearing a large amount of Capitalist related announcements.
There's a shit ton of them.  Someone must be engineering this.
You attempt to find the source, but can't find it in the immediate area.

Superlagg (5): Spoiler!

Attempting to communicate to the syndicate believing they're security clowns.  Never thought I'd be typing that in my life.

Pffft.  Code Nuclear?  That's not even a real thing.  They're just trying to play along with the security clowns.  Now this, THIS is an event worthy of attention.
You attempt to communicate with the security clowns telling them that alcohol is ready in the bar and that the party is gonna be there.
You get some confused answers over the radio, mostly other stationeers to take the situation more seriously.
Ha, those wacky jokesters.

New525 (6-): You head out to go on a rampage on the crew.
Or at least you would but you appear to be bolted in.
You look for the nearest window not going into space and bust it down.
That fucking clown is still here somewhere.  You can smell it.

Current situations:
Security Level:NUCLEAR! (Only personnel actively harming the crew or aiding the syndicates are to be dealt with)
Disk Location: NesMettaur
Nuke Location: Unfinished room.
Time til Nuke Explodes: N/A
Fluke Ops Incoming: Not only is Awfulworldkid really bad at this, he was purposefully given terrible plans too.
Competent Medical Staff: Medical actions + for the station.
Misuse of funds:Shipping has no budget.
1 star Wanted:Hotcoffeemug (missing), Noah Buttes
3 star Wanted:Superlagg
Station Damage:Armory
Depressurized:Podbay
Engineering, Mechanics, the Bar, the Kitchen, and medbay are open to anyone!
The Janitor's closet is open to anyone expect scientists, Chef's, and Bartenders!
The Captain's Quarters is open to All heads of staff!
The Ore processing room is bolted open!
Communism (25%) vs. (75%) Capitalism

Due to personal reasons, I will be unable to update tonight and I may not be able to update tomorrow afternoon.  The next update will be tomorrow night if it's not done by 3:00 PM. Central.

[New525]

I head towards the bar to continue my search for that fucking clown

[Bologna Prime]

I take my crate and extinguisher to the owlery. I attempt to commune with Hooty McOwlface, asking him to use his mastery over beasts to bless my capsules with an immense enmity for the syndicate menace.

[HotCoffeeMug]

they can run but they cant hide im coming for them!

[HydroFloric]

Oh no not syndies,im going to go buy a chocolate bar before making a phosphorus and pottasium pill.

[LuigiThirty]

I did it, exploding chili weed! I *laugh maniacally. I'm prepared for anything! I've got to defend my plants! And my bee! I dig through the mousetrap box and CAREFULLY try to set up an exploding weed chili mousetrap bomb in the Botany lobby.

[a pleasant hug]

Having failed to make pipebombs, I fall into a deep depression until I hear an AI call for Engineering.

--Completely disregard all morals, space law, and anything else that stands between myself and repairing that 4th wall.

Inventory:
Equipped: Engineering Uniform, Radio Headset, ID (Engineering), Backpack, Utility Toolbelt, InsulatedStun Gloves, Orange Shoes
Pockets: PDA (My own), Emergency Oxygentank
Backpack: Box (Contains father's lucky ketchup bottle[full], $500, T-Ray Scanner, Breath Mask), RCD (50/50), Sheets of Metal, Sheets of Glass, empty bar glass
Utility Toolbelt: Screwdriver, Wirecutters, Crowbar, Wrench, Welding Torch, Atmospheric Analyzer, Multitool

[NesMettaur]

well
shit

Once I've wired the Bar to the teleporter network, I grab myself a drink from behind the bar and hit the slots hoping no one notices me as "that dumbass mechanic that announced he had the nuke disc."

[pizzatiger]

I hack into the Nanotraisen Announcement system to give a rousing speech to the syndicate and crew on how we can work together to turn this station into a flying utopia where we don't have to serve corporate scumbags who look out for just themselves. During this speech I inform the crew that nanotraisen harvest the farts in the air to create plasma while also deducting from the paychecks of crewmembers who fart for "polluting the air", resulting in nearly everyone on this ship having to pay NANOTRAISN money during pay time instead of the other way around. They are using your farts to make money while deducting you for doing it!


That should be the needle that breaks the assistants back

[NateTheSquid]

"fuck, fine"

";listen up crew, i don't give a shit what you are doing, go fight those syndicates, wherever they are. if they plant the nuke, they'll be the only communists left around here."

";if you are communist, like me, we must work together to expel these murderous communists, and if you aren't communist, then im sure you just wanna kill those communists anyway."

with that, i run over to the ai upload and attempt to upload a 'syndicate agents are non-human' law.