Login

MollyMillions · 12-07-2014, 11:11 PM

https://soundcloud.com/molly_millions/tw...e-spacemas Here's a recording of me reading a thing I wrote for the forums a year or two back.

Twas the night before Spacemas, and all through the station
Scuttled various employees of the Nanotrasen Corporation
Assistants clustered around ATMs with care
In hopes that their paychecks soon would be there.

The engineers were a-bustle 'round an engine still cold,
While research endeavored to turn lead into gold.
And the HoP in a helmet, the HoS in a cap,
Had settled on the bridge to smoke joints with the cap(tain).

When out on the solars there arose such a clatter
that nobody heard, 'cause sound travels only through matter.
Had they gone to the windows, their guns well in hand,
They might have seen, and stopped, the red-suited man.

The engine sprang to live with a disastrous roar,
Sucking up walls, grilles, windows, and floors,
When what should my camera so easily record,
But a laughing masked man, a syndicate saboteur.

In the chapel, a simultaneous scene fascinated,
I saw the chaplain stung, felled, eviscerated.
The proboscis that drained from his body all liquid,
came from a changeling, a creature vile and wicked

"All Personnel please report to medbay for ass inspection."
I intoned with emotionless metallic inflection.
The crew was uncaring, at best, in dissaray
Confused as I chanted "Ass day. Ass day."

The station fell fast into further trouble,
When martians showed up inside the cargo shuttle.
The brave and the curious met with their deaths,
So security fled alongside all the rest.

And then a thing happened I still don't understand,
The changeling spit acid at the red-suited man.
The two began a duel that led them up hallways and down,
And nearly took the life of one innocent clown.

More operatives showed up, just a few, most had died,
Leaping into space with air masks left inside.
The survivors brought weapons slung on their backs,
One had all four bombs, the other, a crowbar in his pack.

How violent the conflict, my eyes danced with jubilation!
Those three syndicate clones faced a shambling abomination!
He gargled some nonesense my translators don't understand
but I take it to mean "Peace in space, goodwill toward man."

I cordoned off the attackers by electrifying doors
Shocking several crewmen, and killing a few more.
Those who could fight began to come out of their holes,
Believing themselves to be valiant and bold.

And the funniest thing happened on that special night,
The RD emerged, with his eyes alight!
He charged in to battle with a bomb in his hand,
Into a shocked airlock that quite ruined his plans.

The blast cleared the way for the changling to win,
and to absorb all the corpses and store them within.
The creature never suspected the approaching singularity,
That swallowed him whole and quite outdid his barbarity!

The shuttle was called by whom I don't know,
it's a record my database for some reason won't show.
Past vacuum and martians and worse things they ran
And packed into the shuttle like sardines in a can.

The crew whined bitterly as they sped back to CentCom
That I had broken my laws, or that I had done wrong.
But they heard me explain as the shuttle touched down,
"4) There is only one human, and he is the clown."

post idk cool spacemas gifs etc, maybe we will nab them for gimmicks for instance here is the best pod replacement icon ever

[Image: 3FjWdH5.gif]